Futurama (TV Series)

Bender Should Not Be Allowed on TV (2003)

Billy West: Philip J. Fry, Prof. Hubert J. Farnsworth, Dr. Zoidberg, TV Announcer, Network President

Quotes 

• Calculon : That was so terrible, I think you gave me cancer! I don't care how popular you are, you will never work on my show!

  Fry : Yay, Bender!

  Turanga Leela : We demand Bender!

  Calculon : However, you've got the job.

• Professor Hubert Farnsworth : Those ruffians smoked one of your cigars.

  Hermes Conrad : That's not a cigar... and it's not mine.

• Cubert J. Farnsworth : Hey, dad. Bite my shiny, metal ass!

  Professor Hubert Farnsworth : What? Such an act would be most uncomfortable for both of us.

• Turanga Leela : Children don't turn rotten just because of what they see on TV.

  Fry : Yeah, give some credit to our public schools.

• TV Announcer : We now return to everyone's favorite show, already in progress. Everybody Loves Hypnotoad.

  [TV shows Hypnotoad staring] 

  Fry : This show has been going downhill since season 3.

• Fry : What kind of bozos would form a Bender protest group?

  Professor Hubert Farnsworth : Good news, everyone! Hermes and I have formed a Bender protest group.

  Dr. Zoidberg : That was uncanny.

• Fry : Look, there's that child actor who grew up and robbed a convenience store.

  Turanga Leela : And there's that child actor who grew up and became a convenience store.

• Professor Hubert Farnsworth : There'll be no further nasty! We still have the option of resorting to violence.

  Hermes Conrad : What makes you think that'll work?

  Professor Hubert Farnsworth : I saw it on TV in that episode where Bender shot Calculon. How cool is that?

• Dr. Zoidberg : [arrives at Cubert's birthday party dressed as a tramp]  Hey, boys and girls. It's Zoidberg, the loveable tramp.

  Turanga Leela : Since when do you perform children parties?

  Dr. Zoidberg : Performing? What? Can anyone spare some money to buy a pair of shoes?

• Turanga Leela : Bender, your swarthy Latin charm will only get you so far. There are a lot of professional child robots here.

  Fry : Look, there's Macaulay Culkin.

  Turanga Leela : He's just not cute since he had puberty installed.

• Network President : Greetings. You all know my execubots. Executive Alpha, who is programmed to only like what he has seen before...

  Executive Alpha : Hey, *hey*, hey!

  Network President : Executive Beta, who is programmed to roll dice to determine the fall schedule...

  Executive Beta : [throws dice]  More reality programming.

  Network President : ...and Executive Gamma, who is programmed to underestimate Middle America.

  Executive Gamma : It's funny, but is it going to get them off their tractors?