Photos
Quotes
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Principal Figgins : Schue, I'm afraid Sue is right. You have indeed "stepped in it".
Will Schuester : I didn't even know that this was going on.
Sue Sylvester : Well of course you didn't Will. You wouldn't even know if your Glee Club was using your office to breed rabbit for pets or for food. You know why? You're too busy chasing tail and loading your hair was enormous amounts of product. I mean today it just looks like you put lard in it.
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Principal Figgins : I'm sorry, Schue, but I cannot let this slide.
Will Schuester : But the kids weren't even paid!
Sue Sylvester : There's a stack of mattresses in the choir room piled as high as the empty hair gel bottles in the dumpster outside your apartment!
Will Schuester : Okay, we'll give the mattreses back.
Principal Figgins : Schue, one of those mattresses was used. You can't return a used mattress. You can't even donate one to charity; lice, bedbugs. I looked it up online!
Sue Sylvester : Is there any reason that you have a soiled mattress in your office, Will? Have you and the redhead become so sexually depraved that you have to commit your craven acts of adultery in between classes?
Principal Figgins : What?
Will Schuester : I slept... you know what? Okay, fine. I slept here, all right?
Principal Figgins : Excuse me?
Will Schuester : [sitting down with a heavy sigh] I'm thinking about leaving my wife.
Sue Sylvester : Well, I didn't see that one coming at all.
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Will Schuester : It's my fault. If I hadn't slept on that mattress, we could've just returned them and moved on.
Emma Pillsbury : Hey, can I give you some advice?
Will Schuester : Please.
Emma Pillsbury : You need to give yourself a break.
[he scoffs]
Emma Pillsbury : You do. You... you'll figure out what to do with kids. You always do. But I think right now you really need to focus on your own life. You know, divorce is a really big deal.
Will Schuester : Who said anything about getting a divorce?
Emma Pillsbury : [realizing her gaffe] Oh, god, I'm so sorry. I just assumed that that's...
Will Schuester : Is that what you would do?
Emma Pillsbury : Well, um... when I first heard about what Terri had done, oh, gosh, no, I thought there should be some sort of law. But then when I thought about it some more, thought about what I would've done if I'd felt you slipping away.
Will Schuester : You would never be that cruel.
Emma Pillsbury : No, her methods were wrong, but, um, I totally undertand her intentions. You're a lot to lose, Will.
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Artie Abrams : But we don't want to go to sectionals without you.
Will Schuester : It's without me or not at all. Look, I was the one who slept on the mattress, which means I accepted them, not you. Which means I'm disqualified from competition, not you guys.
Noah 'Puck' Puckerman : He's taking the bullet for us. Solid.
Will Schuester : We have worked too hard for you guys not to get your shot.
Finn Hudson : We can't do this without you, Mr. Schue. Hell, we probably can't do it with you.
Will Schuester : That's not true. You guys are good. You're really good. You did "Jump" for that commerical without me, right? Look, the best teachers don't give you the answers. They just point the way and let you make your own choices. Your own mistakes. That way, you get all the glory. And you deserve it. Look, if... if you can't win without me there, then I haven't done my job.
Rachel Berry : We're really sorry, Mr. Schue.
Will Schuester : I know. I want you guys to go get gussied up and take that Glee Club photo with pride. I want to see a smile on every one of your faces.
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Will Schuester : [heartbroken that Terri was faking her pregnancy] Why did you do this to us? I don't understand!
Terri Schuester : I thought you were leaving me. You're so different, Will. We both know it. I can feel you. You're pulling away from me.
Will Schuester : Why, because I... I've started standing up to you? Trying to make this a relationship of equals?
Terri Schuester : No, because of the damn Glee Club. Ever since you started it, you just walk around like you're better than me!
Will Schuester : I should be allowed to feel good about myself!
Terri Schuester : Oh, god, who are we kidding, Will? This marriage works because you don't feel good about yourself.
Will Schuester : This marriage works because I love you, because I have always accepted you.
Terri Schuester : No.
Will Schuester : Good and bad.
Terri Schuester : You loved the girl you met when you were fifteen. I'm not that girl.
Will Schuester : You've made yourself a stranger to me now. Are you happy? Are you satisfied?
Terri Schuester : It didn't start as a lie. I really thought I was pregnant. And then the doctor, he said it was a hysterical pregnancy, and I... I just panicked!
Will Schuester : This is insane. What were you gonna do when the due date came?
Terri Schuester : [quietly] Quinn Fabray. It was so perfect. She didn't want hers, and I needed one. I had the doctor use her ultrasound DVD at your appointment that you came to.
Will Schuester : I loved you, Terri. I really loved you.
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Will Schuester : Looks like everybody voted for Rachel. Including Rachel. But we need two captains, guys.
Quinn Fabray : Why two? We're fine with having Rachel represent us in the Thunderclap by herself.
Kurt Hummel : We'd actually prefer it.
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Will Schuester : The worst part is that after all this time, they're still embarrassed to be in Glee Club. I mean, they still see themselves as losers. I just need to get one of them to step up and become co-captain.
Emma Pillsbury : Well, maybe you should let them use the captain they already elected. You know, sometimes things sound a lot different coming from a peer. Even if that peer is as annoying as Rachel.
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Will Schuester : Hey, baby. Which one of these ties goes better with my shirt?
Terri Schuester : You're blocking the TV, Will.
Will Schuester : Oh, come on. I need your help. School pictures are coming up.
Terri Schuester : Oh. Well, in that case, um... wear the red one for the teacher photo and the green one for the glee club. It'll pop more when the cool kids deface it.
Will Schuester : Yeah. I, uh... I wanted to talk to you about that. So, Figgins stopped putting the Glee Club photo in the yearbook because it always gets vandalized, and I just feel so bad for the kids. I mean, they work so hard. They deserve to be recognized. Not being in that book gives the appearance that Glee Club isn't important. I want to buy an ad and use it as the glee club photo spread. It's around $300.
Terri Schuester : [sarcastic] Oh, great. Yeah, why don't you take the food out of the refrigerator and just give that to the kids?
[seriously]
Terri Schuester : Will, that food goes from my mouth right into our baby's belly.
Will Schuester : We have a couple hundred bucks left over from selling the Blue Bomber II.
Terri Schuester : The answer's no, Will. No.
Will Schuester : But if we...
Terri Schuester : No!
[cutting him off as he tries to argue]
Terri Schuester : No. No.
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Will Schuester : [behind Terri's back and writing Principal Figgins a check for ad space in the yearbook] Actually, can you wait to cash that until Thursday?
