Modern Family (TV Series)

Dance Dance Revelation (2010)

Eric Stonestreet: Cameron Tucker

Quotes 

• Cameron Tucker : What else does it say?

  Mitchell Pritchett : [Reading from parenting blog]  Well, this one says 'When my daughter bit her brother, I put a pinch of pepper in her mouth. She cried and cried, but she never bit again. Smiley face.'

  Cameron Tucker : Oh, well, the smiley face makes it okay. 'I waterboarded our toddler, LOL.'

• Mitchell Pritchett : Okay, I don't get it. Why is she biting? Lily, why are you biting?

  Cameron Tucker : She's not biting, she's teething.

  Mitchell Pritchett : On people! All right, if she starts biting her playdates, she's gonna be a pariah.

  Cameron Tucker : Try 'piranha'.

  Mitchell Pritchett : Really, Cam?

  Cameron Tucker : It was right there.

• Cameron Tucker : Oh, wow. I have a daughter who bites and a partner who stings.

• Cameron Tucker : [singing]  Take a bite of an apple / Take a bite of a pear / Take a bite of the cookie that you left over there / Here's one thing you should never do / Don't bite Taylor or Brandon or Sue / Because people aren't food / People aren't food / Your friends will run away / If they're scared of being chewed / And as a side note, private parts are private.

• Cameron Tucker : Ow, you bit me!

  Mitchell Pritchett : Well why don't you sing me a song about it?

• Mitchell Pritchett : It's time to play everyone's favorite game.

  Cameron Tucker : Let's Blame the Gay Dads.

  Mitchell Pritchett : You know who had straight parents? Adolf Hitler.

  Cameron Tucker : Charles Manson.

  Mitchell Pritchett : Shall we go on?

  Cameron Tucker : Naomi Campbell.