User Reviews

My husband is from a very small village in Italy. We have been together over 10 years, lived in both countries, and gone through the excruciating visa and immigration processes. We found this show very late into it; we've been busy between countries. There are some very good things about this show that could be helpful if it was done in a much better way. These young people were never meant to make it in almost every circumstance because they weren't helped by anyone in how to navigate something so difficult. This really hurts people like my husband and myself. If you go on visajourney, you can read many couples together years going through this and having difficulties due to the ignorant thoughts Americans have about other countries and this process. Trump didn't make it the process any worse then it's been for decades but now the level of ignorance is so high; it's insane. My largest problem is that this show takes importance of cultures and other countries and just throws them out the window. Of course, everyone has been told families are very close in other cultures; much more then ours. But you don't really know that being an American. I had to learn as well but no matter what country another person is coming from; better or worse, these people are having to think of leaving a very strong familial circle. Yet all these people and Americans in general have this arrogant idea that they are getting a favor from a green card. These are real people we are talking about. People whom have lives we can't know. My husband is from Italy for crying out loud. There are some from Europe and the only thing they are told is that they're lucky to come here. Has anyone been to these countries and cities outside the US? I lived in Italy and saw much of Spain and here to tell you, there is a beauty and culture I had much difficulty leaving. My husband sacrificed for my kids and myself to leave his family and beloved home when we came back to the US. If you go into this kind of situation, be aware from the first email that you will have to do things much differently. Learn the other culture, TALK to your so on those hundreds of texts and messages. Give the other importance always and be understanding of differences. We assumed no trust at first. We communicated to the other what we expected, time lines, etc. as well as all the difficulties we could face. We began after the first months when we decided to take it more then friendship that it was all or nothing. We prepared research for each im about the other's culture, world views and questions. From the beginning, when he or I called, we made certain to answer where we were, take photos of the moment and send, etc. until we met several times enough to trust and we communicated this verbally. But most important, I was very open and sensitive to the fact he was talking to an American and how much he loved his own culture. When we talked about where we would end up (and we did this for almost 2 years and 5 times meeting with separations) I was very, very considerate of his life there. His family and responsibilities were more important to him. I worked hard to move my children and myself to his country and retired early from the school system. His mother needed him as did his whole family that centered around him. Sacrifices. That is what you need to know going into this. Compromise, honesty, respect of other cultures and putting the other person first. Probably the truest test of love. I think these people needed help understanding that. When we arrived back to the US a few years ago, I had to be separated for 18 months during the process. There were no problems other then a lawyer that was not diligent about one piece of paper needed. It is just a very long process. We have been together 10 years, two countries, many, many challenges most would never even believe or imagine and still love each other very deeply. I don't take one moment for granted and neither does he. We are close to 50, both work very hard here in the US (my husband was a computer programmer in Rome and now works at a factory ft without a complaint). I really wish this show would show more stories like ours so it could be more of a learning show then a dramatic soap opera destined to just make this seem like real life for people already whom know nothing of what this kind of relationship entails and other cultures are.