Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt (TV Series)

Kimmy Gets a Job! (2015)

Dylan Gelula: Xanthippe Voorhees

Quotes 

• Xanthippe Voorhees : Disney has been lying to little girls. Stepmothers are not scary, nannies are not magical, and dwarfs do not let you spend the night at their house without expecting something.

• Kimmy Schmidt : Your stepmother expects you to be at your half brother's party when your full father gets here.

  Xanthippe Voorhees : I'll be back in like an hour. God.

  Kimmy Schmidt : Xanadu, you're grounded.

  Xanthippe Voorhees : Xanthippe. And what?

  Kimmy Schmidt : By the power vested in me as an adult who is a grownup, you're grounded.

  Xanthippe Voorhees : [scoffs]  Okay. Kimmy, IMHO...

  Kimmy Schmidt : Pancakes, got it.

  Xanthippe Voorhees : This is not gonna work. 'Cause nannies like you? I chew you up and I spit you out. Just like all my food.

• Kimmy Schmidt : You're a kid, and childhood is precious. It's okay that you're a virgin.

  Xanthippe Voorhees : What is your deal? What kind of 29-year-old woman wears light-up Skechers? This isn't over. I'm gonna figure you out, Kimmy. And then I'm gonna destroy you.

  Kimmy Schmidt : I know you are. But what am I?