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Reviews
Coven of Evil (2020)
If Carlsberg made terrible movies...
Is this the worst movie ever made? Maybe, maybe not. Wooden acting, terrible plot, absolute garbage! Ps "All hail Satani"!
Becky (2020)
Teenage Kicks
Becky is based on a decent premise, the grieving teenager who snaps into a vengeful daughter, but not enough to sustain 90 mins of movie. The Nazi element makes it current (unfortunately) but otherwise it's a very shallow plot. Interesting to see where she goes with that key though...
Be Afraid (2017)
Average, formulaic horror
Slick production, but otherwise this is a paint by numbers horror, following an worn-out path to a very predictable conclusion.
Jay and Silent Bob Reboot (2019)
A film for fans
If you're a fan, watch it - you'll love it. If you're not a fan - don't bother; this movie isn't for you. The movie was made as much for Kevin and (more so) Jason than anyone else. A nice sprinkling of sentimentality, with some touching moments (both Kevin and Jason's children are in it). Can get a bit mired in its own nostalgia at times, but we should let them have this one - they've earned it.
Halloween II (2009)
Even worse than H20
Even worse than Zombie's Halloween remake, this could be the worst movie in the Halloween series. Sheri Moon on a white horse sums it all up.
Halloween (2007)
Over the (Sheri) Moon
Zombie puts his own unique spin on a classic, which is a mistake because his unique spin involves Sheri Moon and poor directing. The whole backstory was irrelevant and takes a lot away from the menace of the original. Skip it and go straight to Carpenter's recent reboot, which is a great movie.
Fantasy Island (2020)
Lazy and confused
Wager thin plot, drab acting, and completely uninspired. It's not often I will say a movie is terrible, but this is terrible.
Bloodshot (2020)
An average Vin Diesel Movie
Vin Diesel as a super solider/jacked up badass with a moral code, Guy Pierce as the smart supervillain, and a good looking female sidekick. Could be Fast and Furious 17, could be any Vin Diesel action movie that's relatively easy to consume.
Blood Machines (2019)
Surreal, strange... and brilliant?
This is definitely one of the strangest things I've seen, and I've seen a lot of strange things. Visually stunning, and borderline genius.
Midsommar (2019)
Horrific, but not horror
This is an exceptional movie, but not for all tastes. It's horrific in parts, but definitely not a traditional horror movie. I can understand why the average 'consumer' of routine horror movies didn't like it, as it requires more thought and emotional involvement than the average consumer is prepared to invest in a movie. If you want gore and shocks, stick to Rob Zombie trash. If you want to be emotionally challenged, then this is for you.
Death House (2017)
Awful!
It took me 5 sittings to watch this movie, it really is that bad. I was so disappointed considering the greats involved but it's all over the place. Not only did I not know what was going on, but I didn't care. I'm an avid horror fan, and will watch anything but this is just terrible.