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F9 (2021)
Anti-climatic, clunky, and hilariously stupid
So I just saw F9 earlier and yeah, it kinda sucked. How can you be more stupid and ridiculous as this. As a fan of the Fast and Furious franchise, I was more open minded than most people. This was the first movie in the franchise I've seen in the theater and it turned out to be the worst. I knew of the negative reviews on this website, but that still didn't stop me from seeing it in the theater. I went with my mom wanting it to being one of the best in the franchise despite what people said, but my god, this is so stupid. The other movies were a bit dumb, but at least they had a little bit of realism thrown in as well. Here, we have our protagonists being thrown into cars, as well as survive explosions, being incinerated inside flipping vehicles, and even traveling to outer space, and they barely make a scratch and break a sweat. They just go and pretend it never happened.
We do get a nice flashback to Dom's father being killed in a car explosion but here comes the first plot hole and continuity error in the movie. In the very first movie, Dom recalled seeing his father getting in the car crashing and the car burning and his father screaming whilst being roasted alive in the flames. In this movie, the car immediately explodes when crashes, killing the father instantly. Did the writers even watch the first movie?? I call BS on that.
And we get the biggest plot hole which is Han surviving the explosion in Tokyo Drift which makes the climax and the stakes of Tokyo Drift completely and utterly pointless. It means that Tokyo Drift didn't matter. We get an explanation that Mr. Nobody was there at the time of the explosion and Han SOMEHOW DISAPPEARED WHEN MR. NOBODY WALK PAST!! That's the explanation we get from how Han survived!! And guess what folks, it goes nowhere. We get another subplot about a young woman being saved by Han when she was 10 after seeing her parents killed in a car explosion and that goes nowhere. SO WHAT WAS THE POINT OF THAT TOO, HUH?!
There's a hilariously bad scene where Roman kills some of the bad guys and he supposed gets crushed by a tank and its supposed this emotional scene, but guess what, he survived. This franchise has turned into a comedy now.
John Cena falls into the left side of a car and he SOMEHOW SURVIVED!! Yes, we have got to the point where someone fall on a car and be perfectly fine.
The most hilariously stupid scene in the scene and the entire franchise is when Roman and Tej are in a car that's attached to a plane and they put on astronaut suits before they actually get into outer space! They also get involved into a explosion in outer space and they SURVIVE!! A HUMAN (or humans) CAN GET TO OUTER SPACE WHERE THEY GET INTO AN EXPLOSION AND HAVE NO SCRATCH OR SWEAT!!! WTF, MOVIE!!! WERE THE WRITERS ON CRACK WHEN THEY WROTE THIS MESS?!!
Anyway, that's enough for the review. This movie is unintentionally hilarious, stupid, pointless, and an absolute low in the franchise. Even this review is a better movie and more focused than the entirety of F9. Skip this one if you're a huge fan of the franchise.
Fight Club (1999)
A masterpiece that I'm not going to talk about.
Everyone is breaking the 1st rule of Fight Club: Don't talk about it.