This is one of the best anti-war films ever made. Inspired by a brilliant book written by a Czech writer Hasek who (like Tolkien) participated in one of the saddest events in human history which was World War I. As is well known all world wars were pre-planned by a handful of the richest and most influential people who rule our planet in the 1850s. If you want to be a flaming optimist their long-term goal may have been to change the political and economic mechanisms of human civilization towards a better future for all, but short term they made them lots of money. There is no better business than war and the bloodbath of 1914-1918 in Europe was one of the best in history. I have nothing but admiration for the main characters, plain soldiers, in this movie who show little reverence for their braindead officers who in turn view them as little more than cannon fodder. It exposes war as a game played by psychopaths for whom some imagined values are worth more than the lives and happiness of millions. If it wasn't so horrible it would be funny - adults behaving like children at play: wearing ugly uniforms like employees at a fast food restaurant, losing limb and life to get someone to hang a small piece of metal on their chest or sew a white line on their shoulder. Brainwashed children thinking their deeds will be remembered forever while a few days is the limit. These guys know all this and I cheered them on their journey every step of the way. Congratulations to the director for a very profound message wrapped in entertaining and intelligent package. This movie is a big middle finger to the war pigs who make money on human suffering. Europeans beware. They already organized 2 of these bloodbaths on your continent and now a third one is brewing. They are already counting their millions but they want more. It's never enough for them.
Reviews
14 Reviews
The Young Lions
(1958)
Famous names for content - fail
23 August 2020
Warning: Spoilers
This is one of the most deceitful movies in Hollywood's history. They were hoping to substitute intellectual content for famous names. Marlon Brando, one of the best actors in the history of US cinema, was asked to look cool and pronounce the most generic lines one could think of. There isn't one Hollywood movie that tries to intellectually tackle Nazi ideology. This piece of garbage is as far as away from such a treatment of this subject as you may wish. All you could hear from Brando's lips are the most generic Hollywood lines you could think of. "I wish it were so easy" and so on. The only point being to dismiss it without discussion. The only purpose behind this piece of garbage was to make Germany look bad. That is all. 1/10 is too much. Pure garbage.
The Pianist
(2002)
Most personal movie for Roman Polanski
23 August 2020
Warning: Spoilers
This is the most insightful movie about WWII ever made. Germany, led by a demon-possessed madman Hitler and terrorized into submission by his minions, against better judgement of most of its military commanders started a war in Europe believing it could lash back against the Versailles treaty. Poland led by the worst politicians one could wish upon a country was the first victim. Polanski and Szpilman, a promising pianist, on whose story the movie is based (but some of the scenes come from Polanski's own past), weave a tale of survival in the madness that follow. Poland was mercilessly bombed by Nazi Germany and then invaded from the East by Soviets. It was occupied until the end of the war and since it was home to most of Europe's Jewish population it was picked by Nazi leaders to be the graveyard of Jews. Scenes from the Warsaw ghetto leading up to the transportation are a mix of Szpilman's and Polanski's experiences. After that it's mostly Szpilman. He was holed up in an abandoned apartment on the Aryan side of Warsaw just by the Jewish ghetto wall by members of Polish resistance (the largest resistance force in Europe counting over 1000,000 members, contrary to the lies spread by Hollywood who want it to be the French resistance which was a joke compared to Poland's) and he witnessed both the ghetto uprising of 1943 on the other side of the wall (watch the scene with the cannon) and then the Polish Warsaw uprising of 1944 which was a festival of bloodshed that cost the lives of 200,000 Poles.The blowing up of the military hospital with a panzerschreck and the destruction of the tank, and everything else belong to that bloody event. Without spoiling, what happens next, is the most human side of WWII ever put on screen. Spielberg, watch and learn. The drama of so many good human being caught up in all this madness. God bless you Roman Polanski for this movie, God didn't save you for nothing. God have mercy on all good people who perished during this madness, whichever country they may hail from. Never again. That is the lesson.
One of the dumbest, worst movies ever made
22 July 2018
A cringeworthy 2-hour long string of dumb cliches and scenes so predictable that would make a baby yawn. It's filled with so much laughable pathos that it makes it look like a North Korean or early Soviet propaganda film. The choices the characters make and the sudden "genius" solutions or realizations they come to, sometimes obvious even to children or jut plain moronic, make them look like halfwits. I'm so glad I didn't pay a dime to waste 2 hours of my life to be tortured by this thing. When the end credits started rolling I went to the bathroom and flushed the toilet to serve as my opinion on this - it's so bad it's comical, like something Ed Wood could have made. I gave it 2 stars out of respect to all those people who worked hard under the false impression they were taking part in something grand. Disney already paid George Lucas to destroy his franchise, otherwise he should be suing them now.
Envy
(2004)
Sad attempt at a comedy
10 March 2005
Movie about a couple of friends, one of whom suddenly turns out to be a complete genius and in 5 minutes flat invents something that makes him richer than Bill Gates. One of the dumbest, most unrealistic and most pathetic unfunny films I've ever had the displeasure of seeing. It's supposed to be a comedy but I'm willing to pay anyone who can point out a scene worth a laugh in it. That is, there are lots of scenes that attempt to make you laugh but instead they'll just annoy you. Christopher Walken struggles to maintain his dignity but the nonsensical character he portrays causes him to come out like a sad clown. The main two characters look even worse. They produce their foolish lines like they were forced to do it and they look completely unconvincing, as if they were thinking at all times: "What on Earth am I doing here?" You can plainly see that they can't wait for this dumb show to be over so they can collect their money and run. I bet Rachel Weisz went about with her face covered with shame long after accepting her role in this disaster, and she spent many a night crying her eyes out realizing what a bad move that was. To sum it up: a terrible waste of time and avoid it even if you have to pay to do it.
Don Juan DeMarco
(1994)
A dismal attempt at a romantic tale
10 April 2002
This movie is supposed to be romantic, beautiful and full of subtle grace. It fails terribly. All that dancing in the moonglow is supposed to be romantic but it's just corny and ridiculous, and it can only make one laugh. Brando is a good actor, but here he is just out of place. In the final scene, dancing on the beach, he looks like a whale. Both him and his partner instead of looking graceful look like a pair of circus clowns. Others, including Johnny Depp, do no better. This was supposed to be a beautiful, romantic movie but what we get is "Naked Gun 4 1/4".
The Big Blue
(1988)
A nostalgic Mediterranean tale
27 March 2002
Luc Besson is a very gifted director and an artist. His talent clearly shows in this movie. It's a tale about two friends for whom deep-sea diving is what life is all about. No question this movie will appeal to those who love diving and the sea. A few comments from a layman - it's a little hard to believe how long these guys can stay under, even if they've been doing it all their life. Isn't this a bit of an exaggeration? The scientific explanation about their special inborn ability I find a little hard to swallow. It seems that the director tried to impress the audience a bit too forcefully. Another point - to me at least the black depths of the really deep sea shown here don't look appetizing, and so the line "I'd like to stay there and don't come up" sounds a little crazy. The film tries to be as international as possible, trying especially hard to impress the American audience with the scenes in NYC and the "The best in the world" line repeated over and over, faithfully following the Hollywood recipe, which orders every movie to have at least one of. Reno's friend and opponent can't act. He doesn't know what to do with his face and he behaves like a spoiled kid. It's hard to follow his motivations and actions. Reno's voice really annoyed my wife Anetka. He sounded as if someone was cutting his neck with a saw. Otherwise ok. Excellent cinematography and great atmosphere.
Hollow Man
(2000)
A hollow movie
26 March 2002
An amazingly bad film. About a scientist who wants to become god by becoming invisible. His co-workers have a little more sense and try to stop him. However, even Plato would have problems understanding the motivations behind some of the characters' actions (if that's at all possible). How can a bunch of clowns like that be called scientists? Every other word ouf of their mouths is f***. If the government has such immature morons working for them then God help us all. Naturally, the movie has the usual ingredients of murders, explosions and nudity that, it stands as proven in the Hollywood success books, ensure a good dollar for the producers of this pathetic flop. The ending is a clear import from "Aliens". The only thing worth mentioning are the special effects, and they are the only reason why one can't give this disaster a '1' it truly deserves with a clear conscience.
Saturn 3
(1980)
A stunning flop
26 March 2002
One of the worst movies ever made, not only in the SF genre (which includes an amazing array of cinematic dung). It's about a robot who tries to shag Kirk Douglas. Harvey Keitel desperately tries to make it a threesome. Farrah Fawcet is there to watch. The movie had a potential to become a good SF classic, like "The Forbidden Planet", but it just lacks any spark, like the director was directing it and making pancakes at the same time. It's terribly flat and artificial. The actors are so "good" you want to get inside the TV and give each one a good kick. Douglas using his final line kills the movie altogether. If you don't end up throwing the tape out the window screaming, in the middle of the show, watch it to the end and learn how not to make movies.
Blade Runner
(1982)
The most powerful SF movie ever
20 February 2002
This is one of my most favorite movies so don't expect me to be objective. The plot is loosely based on a short story by Philip K Dick, often called Dostoyevski of the SF field. It's about an android hunter who is called back from retirement to track down and kill dangerous runaway androids. As he finds and kills them he becomes more and more aware of their struggle to be human, of their yearning for life that can never be fulfilled. They kill their maker when they learn that they can only live a few short years; that they can never be one of us. In the final scene the hunter (Harrison Ford in one of his best roles) finally understands that in their short lives the androids had become more human than humans; that they value life more than us. That's why he was hired to liquidate them. With this film Ridley Scott proved that he is more than just a skilled moviemaker - he is an artist. Sadly, true art is usually noticed and appreciated only many, many years after its creation and it pays little. The movie has an incredible atmosphere. It may not be for everybody. If you are looking for an action flick with lots of explosions then watch "Commando" or other trash like that, or, better still, pour gasoline on your car and set it on fire - there will be a nice explosion and great sound effects (and if that's not enough there is the neighbor's car). This movie is definitely not for people with the IQ lower that that of a frog.
Marie Baie des Anges
(1997)
Beautiful scenery but little else
5 February 2002
This movie promises much but delivers only beautiful scenery of the southern France. We were expecting something along the line of "The Blue Lagoon" spiced with French subtlety, but received a chaotic cocktail of random scenes from the life of a group of disturbed kids. The director was desperately trying to make an artistic movie, but had nothing to say. Everything here is forced, dialogs are stale, the characters' motivations are nonsensical. The only thing the movie has going for it is the beautiful scenery and good camera work.
The Taking of Power by Louis XIV
(1966 TV Movie)
Very detailed but dragging historical documentary
5 February 2002
This movie's a good history lesson and nothing else. Very authentic, but somewhat dragging. The actor playing King Louis XIV can't act, which makes it a little irritating as he's the main character. He's just not up to the part. In the movie the king makes all the wise decisions that affected France for years to come in the space of a minute, but as everyone knows Rome wasn't built in a year.
Delusions of Grandeur
(1971)
The most enjoyable and funniest French comedy of all time
29 January 2002
A great performance from France's Charlie Chaplin - Luis de Funes. This movie is about a money-loving ruthless tax collector in the renaissance Spain, who loses his job and is determined to get it back. One of de Funes' best acts, and a very good job by Yves Montand as his servant. If you don't die laughing while watching this film you may safely assume that you don't have a sense of humor.
The Troubles of Alfred
(1972)
Funny and warm film - French Laurel and Hardy in a solo performance
7 December 2001
This is one of the funniest movies I've ever seen. Pierre Richard plays a character much resembling the one he portrayed in La Chevre, although drawn with much more subtlety. Very fast paced at the start the movie gradually slows down, turning into a romantic comedy. Never dull, bringing Monty Python skits to mind at times. Behind the witty plot is a French writer, Roland Topor. No sledgehammer "Naked Gun"-like humor in this one, but if you like a good laugh and a good plot you should see it.
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