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2/10
Boy howdy, this sucked! Blame the director/writer
29 January 2022
Warning: Spoilers
Watched this last night. I'm keen on Karen Gillan, Angela Bassett, Michelle Yeoh, Paul Giamatti, and several other actors in this. They can all act and deliver great dialog and characterizations. It's a pity they weren't given anything to work with here.

The director (who also wrote this) wants to be Tarantino. Well, Navot Papushado, cash it in now. You have no sense of timing and you apparently can't write a good script nor even steal a good plot line. There are comic books with more coherent plots and more believable bad guys.

Phrases like "turgid writing," "badly-timed," "unbelievable execution," "plot holes" (spoiler: how did they take over the diner at the end?), and "goes nowhere" all came to mind as I watched this.

The TL;DR is "This movie is like a Tarantino film if you stripped out the snappy, quotable dialog, the fight scenes that keep you glued to the screen, and the complexity and occasional unexpectedness of the characterizations, to leave a good cast with nothing to do but bull their way through an awful script and cash their paycheck and leave."

I'll remember the director/writer's name but only to make sure I don't make that mistake again.
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10/10
Agreed!
19 February 2008
I adored the Night Gallery and was very pleased to have recently gotten the complete series.

Many of the segments are, frankly, mediocre, but some are classically terrifying. The episode with Roddy McDowell as the nephew who kills his rich uncle and Ossie Davis as the butler, the episode with Carl Betz as the doctor, "Camera Obscura" with Rene Auberjonois and Ross Martin (taken directly from the short story of the same name), and many, many others: all of these were good for a night of keeping the lights on. It's both good and rather sad to see all these great actors we grew up with who've since passed on. ~sigh~ I just finished watching "Big Surprise" again. And it's still as frightening and funny as ever.
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The Delphi Bureau: Pilot (1972)
Season 1, Episode 0
10/10
Highly memorable
27 September 2007
I can remember large parts of the original TV movie of this as well as the subsequent episodes of the series. Laurence Luckinbill was exceptional in this role. (Celeste Holm wasn't chopped liver, neither; she couldn't help but glow whatever she was doing.) It was a fascinating premise for a show that was, sadly, probably beyond a lot of the viewing audience at the time.

Ironically, the plots for the show were a little thin... although in retrospect, I think that this is more the zeitgeist of 70s television than anything else. (I have the complete run of Columbo episodes from years past, which suffers from similar problems.) The unfolding of the plot is really quite ritual, stylized in a way that has become rather brittle with age. Again, in the mid-70s, we weren't as sophisticated. Perhaps we hadn't seen enough PBS imports of British stuff, yet. :)

I'd love to see The Delphi Bureau come out on DVD.
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Coupling (2003)
1/10
Oy VEH, this was bad!
26 July 2007
I was pretty dubious when I heard that there was going to be a US remake of Coupling, but I figured, "Oh, what the heck? How bad could it be?" I should know better to say that in the country that invented Fox News and "The Simple Life."

It wasn't just that the sets were kinda cheesy. It wasn't just that they copied the script word-for-word. No, it was that the actors were totally unconvincing. Truly awful. {sigh}

Spoken English English is in iambic pentameter. Spoken American English is in iambic quadrameter. English English scripts spoken by Americans don't sound right because the tones are wrong. That'd have been easy to find out if anyone had listened to it. But this brings us back around to the question of why on earth they used the same script. If you wanted to hear the original script, why not just license the original show and save yourself all that money?

I cannot believe that they didn't screen-test this somehow. The sounds of people in the test audiences eating their own left feet out of desperation would have given them a hint that something was wrong.

Sheeeeesh
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Crossing Jordan: Post Hoc... (2007)
Season 6, Episode 13
10/10
Man, I got angry watching this
19 April 2007
Warning: Spoilers
****SPOILER SPOILER SPOILER!!! Don't read this if you haven't seen the episode!!!!*****

As is almost always the case with CJ, it was a good story and there was interesting tension and snappy dialog. What really got me angry was the Ministry of Homeland Security snatching Bug. His reappearance at the end was good, but I think we saw foreshadowing in his reaction to some PTSD stuff for him later this season in reaction to the torture he was subjected to. Be nice if the arrogant little jerk who got things wrong was held accountable, but that's not going to happen.

(BTW, I found the depiction of the HS agents on the show perfectly believable. Friends who I work with actually met a Homeland Security agent in Seattle a year ago. He'd been a cable installer prior to that and was bragging about how he could make us 'disappear'.)
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10/10
Funny, sad, wonderful
7 April 2007
Warning: Spoilers
I kind of feel that Billy Crystal did this film in part to get closure with his father (who died when Billy was 15). It's an amazingly good film and shows off the depth of acting Billy Crystal and Alan King can do. They played very well off of each other in this movie.

It's always nice to see JoBeth Williams on the screen, who I've always thought was scrumptious.

A number of the extras who work with Alan King are extras who you've seen in films forever.

**SPOILER**

Whenever I tell people about this, I tell them about the recurring question Billy Crystal asks his father: "Don't you feel like a putz?" The final punchline of the joke is a classic. (If you haven't seen the film, I'm not going to reveal that much--it's very moving and has even made me think of something similar.)

Go see it. You'll sniffle and laugh throughout.
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Smokin' Aces (2006)
1/10
Torture scenes TOTALLY unnecessary (possible spoiler)
28 March 2007
Warning: Spoilers
You know, I never thought I'd say this kind of thing--I'm a big fan of the "Alien" series and the "Godfather" movies--but the violence in this was completely over the top.

I was skimming this movie on DVD to see what it was like and I landed on the brief exposition by Andy Garcia about one of the characters who was an accomplished torturer. In 15 seconds, I saw enough to convince me I just didn't want to see this movie. It was completely egregious violence and really unpleasant. Electrical torture of someone that caused electrical burns and smoke? The torturer gnawing off the first joint of his own fingers so he couldn't be identified in prison? Nooooo, I think not. This ain't funny and I didn't feel like it furthered the plot or the characterizations at all. It was just unpleasant.
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10/10
Truly amazing!
17 December 2006
Warning: Spoilers
I think the thing that most people will be commenting on is how wonderful it is to see Will Farrell do something with depth. Yes, I know that "Dying is easy; comedy is hard," but I feel deeply touched by the quality of his performance. POSSIBLE SPOILER: I was tearing up at several points in the movie, particularly when he handed the ms. back to Kay Eiffel and said "I loved it."

I'd like to comment on Emma Thompson's portrayal of an author. I know a lot of fiction authors (it's my line of work and, well, it makes for good parties :D ) and I could see some of them in her characterization. It ~felt~ real. The self-absorption was certainly fun. :)

The rest of the primary characters were very good, too. Dustin Hoffman did an excellent job as an English Lit. professor. Maggie Gyllenhaal was delicious, bubbly, and the perfect yin to play off Will Ferrel's yang and, as always, I would follow Queen Latifah anywhere. Hell, even the ~sound track~ was good! I'm going to go buy a CD in January if I don't find one in my stocking next week. :)

I would love to see more of Will Farrell like this. Sure, I may be one of the few people who enjoyed "Bewitched"--though that was for Nicole Kidman as much as anything--but I think that the fluffier stuff he's been doing has been... well, fluffy. A lot of it's good, fun, light entertainment, but this movie feels like it may last for its dramatic value. It tells a good story.
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The Twilight Zone: The Changing of the Guard (1962)
Season 3, Episode 37
10/10
I get choked up whenever I see this
27 November 2006
I've lost count of the number of times I've seen this particular episode and it always always always chokes me up when I see it. It's worse now that I'm older, but I figure that that's due to our becoming more emotionally incontinent as we age.

I've a teacher from 35 years ago who's still alive who I continue to be close to. The episode is a great reminder to everyone to find the teacher that made a difference to their life and thank them for the ways in which they made your life better. (You have no idea how good it'll make them feel.)

One other great thing about this episode is the pleasure of seeing the late Donald Pleasance doing anything. Honestly, he could've read a phone book on camera for half an hour and it'd be worth watching. :)
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1/10
Dazzlingly awful!
7 August 2006
This film is just appalling. I like how he keeps whipping out totally unsubstantiated statistics and "facts" to "prove" his case and talks about perversions-this and perversions-that. Someone was ~inspired~ by a nudist magazine to rape and kill a 5-yo child? Oh, my, oh, my! It couldn't have been this guy acting out something that had happened to him, nope, it must've been the magazine. (Somehow, I think that we should burn Bibles by this criterion given the level of evil they're known to have inspired.) And HOMO-SEKS-YOU-ALLS: the horrors they inflict upon an unsuspecting world are just not to be believed!

Say, have you ever noticed how the people who are compiling reports of this stuff NEVER, EVER seem to have been affected by it despite the amount of exposure they've had? They're clearly made of sterner moral stuff than poor, degenerate so-and-sos like us. (Just ask them; they'll tell you.) Even worse, most married people are busy doing most of what he's talking about... which makes the idea of "who's perverted?" a real dubious question.

File this film with the other hysterical "This is for your own good!" stuff of its era as a historical curiosity that teaches us how to identify and ignore the same kind of highhanded idiots today.
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2/10
Hopeless out of date and bad detective work even then
22 July 2006
Saw this on TCM as filler after "The Maltese Falcon." It's vaguely interesting from an historical POV, because you get to see antique technology of 50 years ago, but none of this is still relevant. Crime's evolved, detection's evolved, and this is just plain out of date. Watching people get the information off of a telegraph form by dusting the form underneath it to see the pencil marks? 16mm film being shot of someone faking a disability? Well, the wallpaper in the apartment is classically 40s; that was interesting for a moment.

Worst of all is the example of tailing someone. Anyone who tailed a suspect as badly as that, even then, would be spotted in the first *block*. Tailing's not done by having the same chubby guy with the same loud tie walking 1/2 a block behind the suspect all day and eating on the other side of a restaurant and watching the suspect while he eats *his* lunch.

If you're watching TCM and this comes on, take a bathroom break. Your time will be better spent.
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He & She (1967–1968)
10/10
I have to agree with everyone else--amazingly good!
7 May 2006
Warning: Spoilers
I was 11 when this show was on. I recall my mother being very fond of it and encouraging me to watch it because of (I think) Jack Cassidy in particular, though she was fond of the whole cast. I can still recall great swathes of dialog from this show, which proves that it was dazzlingly funny and that I clearly watch too much TV. :) The episode where they think everyone's been poisoned (Kenneth Mars: "Dick, I took to the hospital a *stiff* *CAT*!"), or when Dick and friends went up to the cabin and had already been driven crazy by Hamilton Camp, and **SPOILER ALERT JUST IN CASE** body-Englishing--unsuccessfully--the starter on Hamilton Camp's car and having everyone come home after a week with beards (Camp: "Mistuh Hollistuh, when you shave it off, you want to be sure to use an electric razuh." Dick: "Why?" Camp: "Because the pipes ah turned off and theyuh's no hot watuh!" Dick grabbed the goldfish bowl). Kenneth Mars reading a book when Dick and Paula want to sneak out ("Whatcha reading?" "'War and Peace'." "Where are you?" "Page 17."). And on and on and on....

The show was vastly, amazingly funny. I've not seen it since it was on, yet I can remember a considerable number of the scenes and dialog. I'm very sorry that it wasn't continued because it was bloody brilliant. And writing this, I realize how very much I miss it. :(
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Madagascar (2005)
4/10
Ehhhhhhh....
9 June 2005
The three of us saw it and I think it's fair to say that we all felt the trailers were the best part. The timing was really off in the movie--funny, really, the trailers had had great pacing for the gags. The plot was fairly disappointing and the ending was thoroughly unsatisfying. I kept feeling like there should've been more going on throughout.

The animation was good, the characters were okay (yes, ring-tailed lemurs really do act a lot like that, song and dance notwithstanding), and the voices were okay, although I kept feeling like Chris Rock as the zebra smacked a lot like Eddie Murphy as the donkey. Both were fine in their roles and I'm very keen on both actors, but it seemed a lot like the same role with similar, brassy voices. The penguins were very funny and, as someone else said, they should've carried the movie on their own. It'd be nice if the movie had had something like a plot.

Perhaps the most telling response was that, a day later, I still felt let down. There wasn't anything good about the movie I cared to remember.
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A Charlie Brown Christmas (1965 TV Movie)
10/10
A favorite part of my childhood.
26 October 2002
I dearly loved "Peanuts" and the Charlie Brown specials were especially dear to me. I have several copies of Vince Guaraldi's album and they always make me feel warm and nostalgic.

"A Charlie Brown Christmas" is part of my annual holiday TV watching. I even remember the Dolly Madison ads that originally broadcast the first few years it was shown.
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1/10
Worse than I could've imagined!
25 May 2002
Well, I'd heard about this and I just hadda see it when it rolled around on cable. Shoot, it's even worse than I could've imagined.

Michael York must have been really desperate for money to show up in this (although he does his usual good job, I must admit--he really is a trooper). OTOH, Casper Van Dien's performance in this serves only to remind you that his appearance in "Starship Troopers" was Oscar-caliber by comparison. And the constant rewriting of the Bible to suit the filmmaker's or producer's own agendas is really embarrassing to anyone who actually knows their Bible history.

I'd have to rank this film as second only to "Battlefield Earth" for the title of "Bad Film of the Decade."
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film short describing employment testing for the 1941 audience
16 March 2002
We take employee testing and psychological profiles for granted these days, but for the audiences of 60 years ago who hired people by pointing, this was informative. Information is boiled down a bit beyond any reasonable application, but what the heck--it's a short film. And it's particularly interesting to see the psychologist doing the testing get the applicants to fill out a form and then stands behind them and fires six shots in the air from a revolver to see how they react. Now that's two-fisted personnel management! :)

The film has that "industrial giant of the American century" feel to it like many similar films, but it's interesting to see for the way in which information is presented.
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