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1/10
What the?
14 April 2008
It is hard enough to make a comedy where just one of the themes is someone cheating on and leaving his or her spouse, but utterly impossible if that is the only theme. How is that remotely funny to begin with? It is not even fun or funny in a dry, grim sort of way.

Piper Perabo's brief internal struggle with deciding to leave her husband for her lesbian lover whom she has more or less just met is overcome with as much difficulty as a runner tearing through the tape at the finishing line. And all of this is rectified with such ease and no hard feelings whatsoever. I am not making any moral judgments, but I found that appalling rather than funny.

Piper Perabo once again wields her earnest pouting that is supposed to be cute throughout this movie. So nauseating; please try other emotions.

In such an odd, extreme situation as was presented in the movie, I would have expected at least one person to have gone stark raving mad. That, at least, would have presented a pretext on which to base comedy. But as it is, it's as if we are being asked to laugh as someone is cruelly murdered, while the victim smiles and says "Jolly good show".

Late night cable is full of soft-core B-movies about wives turning to lesbianism that are more compelling than this movie.
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1/10
The Tarantino touches were not suited to this movie.
18 September 2006
Warning: Spoilers
This could have been a great movie if Quentin Tarantino had not directed. He really has no idea how to film martial arts scenes. (The second volume, which contains very little fighting, is terrific).

One reviewer on IMDb wrote that a good martial arts scene makes you wish it would keep going on. For instance, you could watch 3 hours of one continuous Jackie Chan fight scene and never get tired. I would add that another quality is that is stimulates the little, imaginative, childish nerve in all of us and makes us want to do martial arts. This movie had neither quality. The fight scenes were embarrassing--I was cringing, waiting for them to end. They looked ugly and absurd.

There was, however, some kind of strange, perverse beauty in how quickly the Bride could kill. Had Q.T. focused on that, he could have compressed this into about 20 minutes, and combined both movies. There was no real plot, and the dialogue was horrendous, so compression could only help.

Not only were the fight scenes choreographed badly, they were filmed badly as well. The battle with the crazy 88s: Too many people on the screen, poor camera work, and then Q.T. makes it even harder to see whats going on with stupid tricks, like going black and white.

An English professor of mine gave me some wise advice, saying "A good artist knows what to leave out." Too many things should have been left out because they had no point, and did not move the plot. For instance, the Bride sitting on airplanes and people driving places filmed in what I suppose was meant to be an "artsy" way added 20+ minutes to the film. When an artist indulges himself and not his audience, he insults his audience.
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John Doe (2002–2003)
A Show that Just Missed
12 April 2004
I get the feeling that my wife and I were the only two people watching this show. The characters were very likeable, and Mr. Doe himself Dominic Purcell was great. I hope that at least something good for his career comes out of this show.

A man appears seemingly from nowhere with total amnesia but possessing the total knowledge contained in the Library of Congress, and then some, turns up in Seattle. While he tries to figure out who he is and where he came from, he becomes a private investigator helping the police with its most difficult cases. The running subplot are hints of his past and a cult organization that either created him or is trying to control him.

This makes for a very interesting show with the normal episodic suspense of a detective show, but with the bonus with ongoing suspense about the detective himself. The cast and their roles were great. This show was simply begging you to like it. What failed was the writing. The premise of the series and the plots of each episode were great, but execution was terrible. In every episode there was some completely absurd part that made you cringe. The writers never seemed to figure out what it meant to know everything. Doe not only is smart, but also has instant muscle memory and can learn new physical tasks instantly. In one episode, he even predicts the weather. And sadly, some of Doe's knowledge is totally absurd. For example, in the first episode, Doe recites the entire binary code (in ones and zeros) for the original version of MS DOS in front of a crowd of astonished spectators in a matter of hours (the crowd sticks around to hear it all).

The idea that this guy knows everything is pretty incredible but leaves an huge area to work with, but this concept was totally abused. As much as I would have liked the series to work, I was left only with the impression of the pretentiousness of the writers. It's pretty hard to create an almost omniscient character when you yourself are pretty dumb. I think that under more capable hands, this show could have been great.
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Fight Club (1999)
1/10
This movie was not made for me
4 January 2002
I have read other reviews of this movie, and I think that my outlying, grossly negative opinion, may have something to do with the fact that I do not identify at all with this movie. I am proud to say this. It is sad that so many people did see something of themselves in this movie. I feel truly sorry for you.

It was obviously never this movie's intent to be entertaining, or to make you care about the characters, humanity, or society.
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Fight Club (1999)
1/10
You too may be a candidate for project chaos
4 January 2002
Let me just get this out of the way right off the bat -- I hated this movie. I think the initial meeting of Jack and Tyler explain how opinions of this movie are divided -- Jack says something about single serving friends, and Tyler disinterestedly dismisses his cleverness. Unfortunately, my friends, being clever for clever's sake is not entertaining and it is not art.

For those of you who loved this movie, perhaps identifying yourselves with the main character is not appropriate. The point may be that you are just one of the moronic automatons (do hyper-clever acts of terrorism, like a hyper-clever movie), so the joke's on you. You might also note that the project chaos morons are not recruited for their propensity for violence, but for their desire to think in complex and sensitive ways. Much like the fans of this movie.

I tend to rate a movie on only two criteria: Was it entertaining? and, Did I care about the characters? As both of these answers for Fight Club are definitely "NO", what am I left with? A movie with an unoriginal message, revealed in an unintellible way, full of commercials (Starbucks, Busch beer, Pepsi, to name a few), with decent acting.

Yes, the pseudo-intellegentsia are all suckers, easy prey to a little pretentiousness they identify with. In making this obvious fact a little more obvious, the movie was a success. Maybe the point was to think for yourselves, in which case the only natural reaction should be complete loathing for this film.
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