Reviews

Young woman running through forest probably being chased by something comes to a lone cabin isolated in the woods. After banging on the demon clad door knocker it opens to b greeted by Grandpa Munster as the professor in his cardboard crypt - bad puns and all. Taking all the cues from "Tales from the crypt" and none of the screen play - creepytales girls night out really fails to deliver even on camp. The acting ranks lower than late night infomercials, and it had all of the camera work of the Blair Witch Project with none of the intent. Add to that some Jay and Silent Bob wannabe's, The Professor's crypt remade to be a wood shed (the covered up the windows and removed the Spencer's $19.95 discount knocker) and a Rabid Scooby Doo mask and we have 3 stories that absolutely do not deliver on anything ... horror, camp, or gratuitous boob shots. The sad thing is I really have to give the producers credit on 3 really unique story lines that really could have gone somewhere. Sadly - we are waiting for the professor to finish his cocktail for another bad pun.

To steal the first part of a otherwise stupid professor quote "Nothing can make you more blinder than love" except for those in the editing room to think this would actually be worth putting your name on.

First of all, how often do you get to see Jack Nicholson at bottom billing, and enjoy a movie. Little Shop of Horrors is a classic farce summing up everything Corman has done to this point. The characters are deliciously over-the-top and ingeniously played by the cast. And the movie throws in one-liner after one-liner, keeping you laughing hard enough (intentionally) you don't notice the little things that bother you in other Corman movies. My favorites include "If hit by a truck call your physician." and "it grows like a cold sore on the lip". The chase scene at the end is something to make the Zucker and Abrahams families proud. So lets all grab a bottle of Dr. Phlegm's cough syrup and drink a toast to the one of the great underground movies that Roger Corman got right. I didn't mean to.

OK someone is playing with my brain... in the cheap horror movie package deals I can usually snag for 5 bucks - this one was advertised as "a lesbian Nazi and her gang of misfits...". Oops, what I got instead was a neo-Christian morality flick about the horrors of organ donation and adoption. Not that I was disappointed per say - but definitely not what advertised. (I will have to get "THE Harvesters" somewhere and see what I was supposed to get.) Though this movie did not have the spit and polish of a modern Hollywood blockbuster, it had some very good points. Luby and Lee were OK with the confines placed on them in a "Christian" movie, and even though I figured out the plot way too early in the movie, it was still a fresh idea and kept me intrigued. However they did go a tad overboard with some of the stereotyping including the paranoid next door neighbor, the computer hacker, the evil front man, and the "good" German surgeon.

With all that what I ended up watching was a semi-decent made-for-TV medical thriller. Now to initiate the search for the Nazi lesbians...

I am really having a hard time determining how bad this movie is. Of course it has the stiff acting and low budget effects that I expected, but even with the less than stellar production value - I found myself wanting watch more of the movie and turn it off at the same time. Ms. Steele is cute, a plus for wanting to continue to watch and her acting wasn't all that horrible. But I definitely would have spent more time casting her boss (who must have just graduated from high school a semester early.) and the caveman psychiatrist who uses hypnotism just to get a cheap feel on his female clients. I also would have decided whether this was to be a possession or a vampire movie and stuck with that theme so maybe we could have avoided the male hero being attacked by giant Jawas in the park as squirrels watch sedately gathering nuts. Also a hint to movie personnel - when going into bondage scenes - even light bondage as this movie was - at least tie the rope to the chair, it make the scene that much more effective.

Not the stinker of the movie I expected - but I am also glad I did not pay more than a buck to watch it.

What is it with monkeys and pre-1960 monster movies? This monkey really doesn't even have a major role, but we will cast one just to make this movie more authentic?? Besides that fact, this was a decent little intrigue flick. Taking an obscure at the time disease, and showing close-up of random medical literature (that has nothing to do with anything in the movie by the way) add the element of truth every movie needs to cause fear. Control this rare disease with an elixir of pititary (yummy!) and you have a monster. Add to it some real clever at the time plot twists and this movie is better than most.

And for people like me that love the corny gems hidden inside old movies this one also delivers on the 2 well known axioms of dating. First the way to a woman's heart is by poisoning her dad. Second - if you want to keep a woman faithful - make her ugly. Besides every woman needs a good workout on a badmitton course. You even get multiple scenes of Markoff wandering around in his suit like a fat Ricky Ricardo, giving the other cast members the Bela Lugosi patented "look into my eyes" treatment.

One of the forefathers of the current day medical thriller - this movie delivers not only on the sci-fi camp I love but by also being a completely watchable movie. Just trust the fact that there needs to be a man in a monkey suit for some reason.

Mister... there is a giant black and yellow biohazard drum in your living room. Oh wait that is an elevator.

Don't look at the pointy rocks - if you do, some jazzed up version of the Lawrence Welk Orchestra indicates you have been possessed by aliens. Really - I am not kidding. And if you have to fight these aliens you can do it to the triplet-tum of a tenor drum. The music makes this movie loosely based on "The Gods Hate Kansas" absolutely a lesson in why sound tracts should match the movie. There was no connection at all. Add that to some time lapsed photography of my grandmothers fluorescent kitchen lights, abundant use of every tried and true sci-fi sound effect, and winning dialogue like "and I also happen to be in love with you!" and this movie belongs in the running for your underground cheese collection you can't admit that you watch - much less own.

This movie tries to be a run of the mill slasher movie, and would be well on the way to mediocrity if only the quality of the picture was better. Filmed in an unknown American trailer park, this movie made great use of a walk in pantry, some wal-mart lawn chairs, and Hank Jr's flag collection. There was plenty of gore and gratuitous nudity as you come to expect in this type of slasher movies, but it came off as trashy and amusing, instead of seductive and intense as I hope was the original intent. They also had to throw in some emergency scenes such as the sacrificial killing to get some additional nudity to keep the attention of the few still watching, and the wicca nurse to explain what is going on - because there is absolutely no way you would get that information from the earlier plot.

There are some unexpected plot twists that does keep this from being horrible, despite the poor quality of the filming, acting, editing, and just about everything else, so there are a few worse things to do with 90 minutes of your life, such as trying to type a review of this stinker at 3 in the morning without using profanities. Ah well such is life.

The healing power of royal jelly! When a executive of a beauty parlor starts injecting the bee's wax produced by the good Dr's not-so-happy wasps, she turns younger (you'll just have to take the movie's and a push-up bras' word for it). But at a terrible cost that everybody suspects but don't seem very excited to do anything about - until the end.

I almost couldn't believe this was Corman! It had everything Roger was famous for, over-stereotyped characters, cheesy monsters, dialog that pertains to nothing close to the plot, and the underlying moral value that all good movie goers should leave the theater feeling happy about. But I watched the entire movie saying to myself "ya know it really ain't that bad". This movie is much more spit and polished than most of Corman's stuff, and really sets it apart. Honestly, I do not think I would be as big of a Corman fan if this was the first movie of his I had seen, it would not have been bad enough. My only complaint is the same I have with a lot of movies of this era - it ends just in time to make sure there is enough tape at the end to film the dramatic pause, making sure the audience gets the film's moral.

This is one of the better made Corman films in my opinion, so ironically probably one that I will re-watch the least.

Ah, the magic of biblical apocalypses. Eve and Lily - step-sisters are the re-incarnate of their namesakes, wife 1 and 2 of Adam of Genesis fame. So when these two lovely young ladies along with 2 of their friends isolated themselves for a week at a lagoon-side lake house - with a hunky young handy-man who isn't named Adam, all Hell breaks lose.

This would be a very decent home-made movie. The plot is acceptable, if not exactly mind consuming. And the music was awesome, it fit well with the movie and didn't distract even with all of the plugs to the bands interspersed through out the movie.

The problems however took all the potential entertainment value out of the movie. The pace was ungodly slow. I completed an entire pedicure with a paper-clip during the movie waiting for something to happen. Even at the end of the movie where stuff did happen - it still seemed to occur in slow motion. The acting as in all teenage horror/thriller flicks was horrid and cheesy. I could accept that and wouldn't comment on it except there was potential scattered throughout the movie. And please - if the unknown actresses are to do their own stunts - teach them to drive a stick. Finally, was I suppose to be frightened of the invisible sting rays? Even with a low budget, non-experienced special effect movie crews, I found them more distracting than anything else. Rubber toys on strings would be more effective.

I am sad to see none of the actresses/actors have many other credits to their name. I would to have seen them gain more experience and do more than take up space.

The title does not inspire confidence that this is going to be a hidden gem. "This movie should be played loud!" so we can crank church music, almost made me turn it off then. But I managed to make it through this and I will agree, this belongs with the moniker of a video nasty, but not for any exceptionally shocking or gory moments, this movie was just that horrible.

Was this a exhibitionist movie overlayed on some decent documentary film of the homeless of NY? Did he get some interesting footage of some drunk puking in his sleep and say "I gotta make a movie around this!"? Or should I mention the shocking scene of some random character brushing his teeth.

Is this a promotional movie for the worst punk rock band in the world? I kept wanting them to break into Peter Gunn, so they wouldn't sing.

Most commenter's claim this is a brilliant show of a man losing all mental facilities. I disagree totally, watch "The Shining", "The Sadist" or even the sticker "Anatomy of a psycho" if you want a case study. This was unbelievable from the beginning. Myself, I would have gone psycho almost at the beginning after being woken up by the bimbo with a drill. And I am still trying to figure out why I should be concerned with the eye of a buffalo.

And never mind the logistics of the power capacity of a battery operated drill, we will just have to accept it. This drill also has an eggbeater and nail gun attachment!!!!! Man technology sucks now a days.

Ferrara may have come out with better things (I'll admit I haven't seen much of his stuff), but I hope this is not one of his best.

It was a dark and stormy night with constant cannon fire in the distance, with the wind scratching a wax record somewhere out of scene. OK the quality of the picture is not Oscar material but hey, this was 1932. At least now I know where H&B got all the gags for the Scooby Doo cartoons. As mentioned in most of the other comments this is a typical Haunted House movie, with only one or two real surprises. There is even the maniac monkey thrown in as with countless other "horror" movies of the era. Were chimps really that scary back then???? The acting is worthy of any community playhouse, I kept looking for the script cards Hanns was reading off of. And I was shocked to learn Hanns actually had musical talent - kinda... sorta... OK not really. But I did manage to make it through this movie in one setting without going comatose, but I did find myself quoting Vera at least once or twice during the movie, "Oh Ted, take me away!".

If you get nothing else from this movie - enjoy looking at Barbara. But really, this movie was not that bad. Usually I groan at the lame herrings thrown out to the viewers like we are dead sheep - this movie kept me doubting myself... ( I was actually correct but wasn't sure until it was obvious). In other words this movie was very decently written.

Not to say there wasn't any detractions. The voice dubbing was horrid, and any movie that starts with a man holding his crotch is not a good indicator of what is to come. Also all employees at Polish Girl(20-25 y.o.) Dorms cannot... I repeat, can not bend any unnecessary joints and when removing a brain from a wolf (don't ask you won't understand even when you watch this) make sure it is alive while cutting. But even with all that I still liked this movie. I can see this being remade into a movie now (If it hasn't already, I saw a 2006 title eerily similar while searching for this movie.) Unfortunately today they would need gratuitous boobage and much more gore to make it sell. Something this movie did remarkably well without. This is a thinking man's movie - just don't be disappointed with the lack of modern "Girl's Dorm" movie expectations.

Man after watching this I feel I should be giving this a higher rating. I know the history, I realize that this was a state of the art movie at the time, I recognize this is one of the forerunners and launching boards of my favorite killing time and treating insomnia movies. But this movie ran slower than (to paraphrase an author I cannot remember the name of) " a overweight python digesting a valium addict. There were a few things that surprised me (sorry not the plot). I kind of liked the power pointish change of scenes, the way the driver's eyes looked in the moonlight (though I really wanted to order a 7-up), the zombie sweat shop (do zombies sweat?) and I am still not sure whether Murder's residence is real or an oil painting. However the bad reveals itself around every corner. Madge, an undeniable classic beauty, was just as animated as a human as a zombie - like watching a 2x4 being bleached in the sun. The vulture who is a hawk, who is a chicken, who is a stuffed doll, and Sinbad and the 5 other zombies sidekicks. I kept thinking during the movie that thank goodness she is dead maybe something will happen. Or OK the bad thing has happened make my brain work. Or does Bela do exhibitionism? Nope, nope, and nope. I changed my vote 4 times while writing this and I am left after this movie feeling like I just finished a classic - but it sucked.

OK now there is a hook. I had to watch the rest of the movie to see what qualified as life threatening horror in the 50's. This movie does deliver compared to the typical 1950's fare. What some people complained of being slow I brought down to building atmosphere. The music, lighting, shadows, all contributed to the mood. Not that this was a fast paced movie by any sense, but I wasn't clawing my eyes out waiting for something to happen. That and the feeling that I have seen this movie before kept me watching for the entire hour.

This movie is far from a masterpiece however. It is filled with tons of the little nuances that made Cro and Servo famous. We had disappearing peafowl, we had Eric trying desperately to get his keys out of the car, and we had adorable little Mickey ripped off and copied into every ex-wife ghost movie ever made. We had wonderful quotes- most delivered by John Hudson himself "you need some one. We need someone out side the confusions of our love for each other". I think I am going to be sick.

This isn't the worst movie you will ever see, but there is no surprise that is wasn't up for a major award in any category. But it does have a strangely fitting last words from everybody's favorite gardener " They Gone - Rest"

I admit - I was lured to this one from the hype - and I didn't stop to consider the sources. "one of the best indie exploitation flicks of the year (1999)", shocking", and " a must have ".

Well - I wasted my money. But not all was bad in this movie. THey at least got the gore right, as well as some of the most unique methods of murder seen in a long time. There is even a storyline (kinda) and that is about it.

But for an exploitation film there is a surprising amount of content - but no exploiting. We get gay sex - sorta. We have 3 inter-racial babes - maybe. We have a psychotic Vietnamese hooker - nice back, oral sex (ok that made me wince) and some female version of Gene Simmons (I don't get that part). We have an honest to goodness Capone - rates among the best of the actors in this film - that is not a compliment. And finally we have a government conspiracy thrown in to - I don't know - try to connect the vengeance/random/theme killing by Jimmy boy to make the Vietnamese psycho seem sane??????? If nothing else this movie proves that the Italians and the Americans do not have a lock on this type of movie. The Latinos can make crap as well as the rest of them. Kudos goes to anyone involved in this accomplishment that overcame it and made a career for themselves.

Basic slasher movie premise, 3 young ladies wreck their car and end up staying with a creepy family. YAWN.

Watching 36 minutes of a premonition of OJ's car chase with a white sedan instead of a bronco. YAWN.

Old lady with hot and cold dementia controlling her daughter... YAWN

23 minutes of watching the actors eat - YAWN Trying to identify what the heck they are eating ... OK there might be a drinking game here ... nope - YAWN

Complimentary shower scenes ... OK got my interest for a couple of seconds.

Completely random and uninspired killings ... YAWN

The ending ... dude! that psycho is deranged - why couldn't the rest of the movie be like the last 5 minutes... unfortunately that is it - My advice - fast forward to the last five minutes and watch that and then put something good in the player - for me I am going back to sleep.

The tag line is correct - remind yourself it is only a movie. This movie has no excuse for its problems. First of all why did they change the title of the version I was watching from "the forgotten" to "don't look in the basement"? Come on - spoil the movie right there - it was so slow I kept yelling at the screen - go on look in the basement already - make something happen. It wasted so much film watching Charolette fill up her coffee cup, watching the patients stare off into space, or just wander up and down the stairs, that this is one of the slowest gore/horror movies in existence. They bring in the one non-sanitarium related character in the entire movie and he is a babbling idiot i.e. "How come you people didn't call about your telephone - It can't be working". I was sick of the flute and organ music before the opening credits and it got worse from there. The patient/staff interactions were the best part of the movie too bad they couldn't relate them anyway to the plot. And every now and then the director remembered this is a horror movie so they cue Danny in to jump out and scream at random intervals. Never mind the fact that they over-steroetyped every mental illness to the point where I actually feel sorry for anybody with a psych problem watching this ridiculous farce. There was no human in any of these patients only the disease. Don't bother watching this more than once - unless you want to make 90 minutes last all day.

I really wanted to find something horribly wrong with this movie... I wanted cheese, I wanted camp, I really wanted trash. What I got was a fairly decent movie. The plot kinda made sense, there were no real scenes where I wanted to state my patented "oh yeah like that is gonna happen". Other than the cast thinking that a formica bar is going to stop an ingeniously costumed wolf terrier that just ate threw a stucco wall... with a budget and modern effect knowledge - this has potential. My biggest issue with the movie was seeing James "P Coltrane" Best as a decisive and intelligent character. But that is my problem not the movie's. Who knows maybe some future film director will dig out the doggie costumes one more time and there could be a much anticipated sequel in the future.

Is there a point where a movie goes beyond campy to just plain dumb? I didn't think so - but Die Hard Dracula is pushing the envelope way into the realm of stupid. It has plenty of camp which I was expecting - the music score was inspired with only 3 songs Ride of the Valkyries, Blue Danube, and some obscure 70's wakka wakka music. And the effects from blue screening the main character over a CNN documentary of Romania, to the magic chest of gold with it's own internal lighting (if you close the top does it shut off like a fridge), to the rubber mouse being pulled across the floor for ambiance, there is plenty to entertain anyone who loves trashing movies.

But I do not think anybody in the production of the movie took it seriously, they set out to make trash from the beginning. You have to try to be this bad. The dialog drones on like the computer who reads weather warnings, the plot was just thrown together as the movie went along, and the cheesy mother/father dialogue should have been delivered to a child of 8 not 18 going on 43. They couldn't even find a stone building to film the interior scenes in - instead they found some Black and White cow wallpaper and "made do".

But what I think really turned me off to this movie is that I felt they tried too hard to be "bad in the good way" and ruined the whole fun of ridiculing the movie. It kind of felt like teasing the class clown... you get no pleasure from it and he gets the attention he wants.

Thanks a lot for ruining my fun guys... This movie had lots of potential for all time camp, but no, you had to try to be this bad.

There is better movie trash to watch, bail on this one.

This movie is required viewing for all parents trying to relive their high school glory days through their kids. Only one adult looks good in this movie and it ain't Walter M. This movie is a classic example of how adults should not behave during their kids' sporting events.

This movie is probably rated higher than I normally would because it was one of my favorites growing up. I actually thought that music from "carmen" was original "the BNB's" song. Now watching it again after twenty-some years I see my tastes in movies has changed but it was still surprisingly good. It definitely made up my mind - I have absolutely no desire to see Billy Bob's version. The plot - stereotypical come-from-behind-feel-good-for-your-effort sports movie that I will admit this is one of the pioneers for that genre. The acting lukewarm - the dialog - forced, but it is still worth it to demonstrate what jerks we can all be trying to be supportive.

Like the other commenter I am shocked a movie of this quality came out of Brain Damage inc. I truly was not expecting much after the hoaky introduction from the Brain Damage spokesman with the spiked hair and leather jacket. Was even about ready to turn off the movie when the first 5 minutes were filming lizards in the desert. But what happened afterwards - while not Oscar material, was certainly better than expected. This is probably one of the best written slasher movies I have seen in a long time (Did that sentence really come from me?). Rarely has a slasher movie plot line interested me as much as this one. Most slashers as we all know rely on special effects and gore to sell movies, this one had little of quality of either, but relied instead on a somewhat original storyline, imagine my surprise. The characters of the Equinox siblings, were excellently written if mediocrely portrayed. Subtract a few dumb ass lines from the meth dealer's script and his character was right up there. The supporting staff needed help - but they were what I have come to expect from Brain Damage.

Anyone who wants a change of pace from the traditional slasher fare movie this is a definite must-see - just fast forward whenever you see a dude with spiky hair.

Why haven't I heard about this film. Matheson's "I am legend" comes to life in this truly scary film. I have never wanted such small bits of happiness to occur in my life. I found myself cheering for a wormy poodle for damn's sake, that is how much this movie has gotten to me. Price once again shows he belongs with the masters. Everybody is comparing this to NOTLD and Omega man. This movie is in a separate league, even if based of the same story. The latter 2 go for the 30 second attention span of todays movie watchers, while Last Man gets you really thinking about how to go on if you were the last man, looking for simple joys such as watching home movies, and finding frustration to the point where you can't help but laugh to keep from crying.

Not that this movie is not without faults. Apparently once you become infected you lose all body mass and a person can tuck a full grown man under his arm and throw him into a station wagon. Also the infected citizens could have been a little more convincing. I realize this is a spaghetti horror film but come on, it is easy to see how Price can sleep at nights. Finally as with most movies like this they apparently were running out of film so somebody hollered " wrap it up" and plop - there is the ending - ruining an expertly filmed first 2/3 of this movie.

Call Dr. Ruth, Matthew has a problem. Apparently Matthew was released from the mental asylum a little too early, on his mom's wedding day to be precise. Unfortunately for them they were a little too touchy feel for Matthew's case. And since then nobody anywhere can make out safely. Throw in kidnapping an older redhead and how can this movie be anything but a classic. Here is how - make it go so slow, that you actually look for dialog with words of more than and 3rd grade education, throw in music from the Love Boat, and just throw an ending together that nobody can believe. And just to spice things down a bit - in all of your gory murder scenes, make sure no blood (or tomato sauce I think was actually used) stains a thread of carpet. We are dragging dead people all over and not a smear on the floor. And finally, why did he have to kill his ?eighth? victim - it made absolutely no sense - like he was going to tell anybody.

I do have to give credit to Matthew - he was very convincing of a lowly educated psychotic. Too bad everybody else tries to play the same role.

Interesting case psych study - but a hard movie to get into, especially towards the end.