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Baywatch Nights: Frozen Out of Time (1997)
Season 2, Episode 12
7/10
Good, but could have been better
16 February 2024
Cheesy, but funny episode of "Baywatch Nights" !

Sven-Ole Thorsen (known as a muscleman in small roles in Hollywood, from "Conan the Baberian" , "The Running Man", "Predator", "Red Heat" and many more) did a nice job as a confused viking, brought back to life after been frozen for around 1.000 years.

But for me as a "Knight Rider" - Fan, this episode holds a special place in my heart, since it's the last time that Edward Mulhare (who played Devon Miles) and David Hasselhoff (Michael Knight) share some screentime before Mulhare died a few months later.

Sadly, this is also the part that should have been done better. A small easter-egg in their conversation or some last words at the end of the episode would have been great, and much, much better then to watch annother reanimated viking creeping on Angie Harmon for a couple of minutes - Yikes!

Still, entertaining to watch, but it feels like a missed opportunity here.
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Cabin Fever (2016)
3/10
They should have made "Cabin Fever 4: Outbreak" instead
26 November 2022
Like others mentioned before, there is simply no reason for this movie to exist. A remake that is 95% like the original from 2002 with 0 new ideas (unless you count slightly different camera angles in some scenes, a new gun and the mention of the internet).

The actors are WAY worse compared to the ones from the first film, Samuel Davis can't carry this movie the way Rider Strong did it 2002, the whole cast seems to be embarrassed to be in this movie most of the time, at least that is an understandable feeling.

While the script of this remake is now dead serious without a hint of humor (making it even more unwatchable), the music score is really laughable, over-dramatic and unfitting, as if it was made for a "Lord of the Rings" movie, gets rejected and was re-used here for no logical reason at all.

It's just sad that they canceled "Cabin Fever 4: Outbreak", which would have continued the story of "Patient Zero" and should have played on a tropical island & a cruise-ship. I would love to watch that movie with a new setting instead of this pointless remake.

Better watch the original from 2002 or maybe give the third installment of the franchise, "Patient Zero", a chance, this one is just plain and boring to watch.
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Grendel (2007 TV Movie)
3/10
Grendel? More like Bore-wulf
16 August 2022
I don't expect great CGI or outstanding acting from a movie that is basically a mockbuster to the 2007 movie "Beowulf" with Ray Winstone and Angelina Jolie and cost less then 2 million bucks.

However, what I do expect is a cheesy, yet entertaining, movie. And the first fight against a CGI-beast, a giant snake, is absolutely okay for such a film. The crossbow with explosives arrows? Pure nonsense, sure, but also comical on a level that I look forward to when I watch some good ole trash. But sadly, after that, the film quickly turns into a lame borefest.

If you change the original story, do it at least to make your movie better or more interesting in *anything* !!

Don't add useless dialog that doesn't help the character development nor the pacing. Some filler scenes are waaaaay to drawn out, while the fights against Grendel are simply very, very badly made, sometimes it seems like the attackers ran into some kind of rubber walls and bounce back, even a duel against a guy in a costume would've look better then what we got here.

Chris Bruno did a decent job as the lead actor and Ben Cross (R.i.p.) is always a good add to a cast. The rest, even the otherwise likeable Marina Sirtis, are so-so at best.

With a better script, action-scenes and a tighter cut this could have been an acceptable sword-and-sandal-like-b-movie with some fantasy elements, good for some giggles and a neat pastime, that was all I was hoping for when I watched "Grendel". But sadly, it failed the main goal of all films: It didn't enterain it's viewers, you will yawn a lot while watching.
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The Highwayman (1987–1988)
8/10
Some fine 80s cheese
18 May 2015
If you are not into classic Sci-Fi shows from the 80s that are rather cheesy, do yourself a favor and just don't watch "The Highwayman". But if you like this kind of shows, if it reminds you of your childhood - go take a look! Yes, some of the SFX was outdated maybe 10 years before this show started, but damn, a truck with a helicopter in it! When I saw that as a child I knew i would love that show.

The 80s atmosphere in the episodes is thick, some sequences doesn't even seem to belong to the real world. Is the Highwayman really guarding the streets? Or is he a hero in some kind of a dreamland? Some in-between limbo maybe? Who knows...

Imo, Sam Jones is doing a great job as the though lead actor here, and Jacko as Jetto - yeah, yeah, I know he's not a real actor, but b(OY!) does he add some lunatic charm to this show. So, all in all, this is not a hit show from the past that everyone has seen and everyone remembers (like "Knight Rider", which is still around as a rerun every now and then), but believe me, it's worth a view!
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SeaQuest 2032: Playtime (1994)
Season 2, Episode 5
3/10
Good start, big let-down
4 August 2014
The first 15 minutes of this episode are OK, the time travel, the remains of human society, a supercomputer and mechwarrior-like robots fighting (although those were cheap CGI-effects, but still worth a watch).

After that, the storyline falls apart rapidly and plot holes appear very quick. Instead of a really human history we only see some videoclips from the past 'cause that's all Lucas can in the database. Instead, he starts to flirt with the machine, and boy, when he carefully caresses the wires of it with a wicked smile I almost feel ashamed for the poor actor...

Iris and Aaron, the last of mankind, spend their entire life alone and isolated, can't stand a human touch - but within a day they forget all that and fall in love (thanks to Piccolos picnic basket I suppose...).

The worst part of the story is the time travel. The SeaQuest can't travel BACK in time 'cause the PAST is gone and they are trapped in the FUTURE. Sorry, what? How the hell can there be a FUTURE without the existence of a PAST ?! That's freakin' impossible! Worst of all, they have to secure the future of mankind to save time and re-activate the timeline. Really? Has anyone of these authors seen any "Star Trek" episode? Or a movie, let's say, "Back to the Future"? Or owns a working watch?! You can change the FUTURE in the PAST (or in the PRESENT). Whatever you do in the FUTURE can't change the PAST! And more of all IT CAN'T STOP THE PAST FROM EXISTING!!! OTHERWISE THERE IS NO PRESENT; NO FUTURE; NO NOTHING !!!

My goodness. The final scene is just embarrassing. To bad. Good start, but the rest is just a mess.
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Booker: The Pump (1989)
Season 1, Episode 2
9/10
One of my favorites
25 September 2013
Another remarkable episode of this rather underestimated show.

First of all, great storyline, Booker has to face his past (seeing him walk around the chapel again is one of the best moments of the entire show!) and struggle with the present. When Hoffs get injured and Booker has to deal with a notorious gang which try to hunt him down, no real fan will switch away.

Again, we have guest appearances from 21 Jump Street: Steven Williams (as the ever-so-stern Captain Fuller) and Holly Robinson as Judy Hoffs (I guess some of the girls watching this show are envy about the close relationship between Booker & Hoffs, but it fits just perfect to me). Don Cheadle did a great job as gang-leader Frenchie Sayles, and I recommend everyone should watch the top-notch final scene of "The Pump", Grieco and Cheadle show some fine display of acting here. I also like to mention the rather unknown Michael Alldredge as the old cop "livin' on the pump", he did a fine job, too.

If you like Booker, make sure that you don't miss this one here. 9/10.
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Booker: Booker (1989)
Season 1, Episode 1
9/10
Great Start
19 September 2013
I always liked 21 Jump Street, and so, of course, I decided to watch the Spin-off, Booker, as well.

Don't know where all the hate comes from. The starting episode is just great, we have a guest appearances from Peter DeLuise (Doug Penhall) and Steven Williams (Captain Fuller) to support the show. And we get to know the new cast, an interesting one, especially Carmen Argenziano as a typical 80s Boss named Chick Sterling (oh, what a name!) and Katie Rich as the cute Elaine Grazzo.

Also, the first case Booker as to handle was fun to watch. I like the start of this show! 9/10 !
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6/10
A confusing, yet rather entertaining start
13 September 2012
Warning: Spoilers
When I first watch this I had no clue what was coming at me. I admit, I just thought "oh, another Spiderman series" and that was just what I expected: Our Webslinger, them good old foes (Green Goblin, Doc Ock, Kingpin – you know the deal), MJ and Aunt May, The Lizard, Eddie Brock, Triple J... All the right stuff for a new Spidey show.

Little did I know, this one is completely different. The Story-Arc about the so-called "Counter Earth" is rather promising, but some elements just doesn't work here. Especially Venom & Carnage are VERY different from the villains we use to know from other Spidey-Shows or Comics. We never really see the hosts of the alien parasites (Eddie Brock and Cletus Kasady) plus they seem to have changed to some kind of liquid shapeshifters – very odd! It's also rather hard to believe that the NY-Citizens forget everything Spiderman had done for them in no time and start to attack him (inlcuding firemen that just saw him save a mother & child from a burning house and calling him "Murderer" for no reason at all) just because Triple J said so…

In Counter-Earth, Liberace seems to be the main technician considering the purple and rosy look of the Machine-Man and Hoover-Bikes of the Beastials there… Fun aside, the Beastials are interesting new entries to the Marvel-Universe and damn, that new Spidey-Suit (inventet by Dr. Reed Richards as he mentioned in this episode) is cool!… even with that stupid web-cape >.<

All in all a little messy episode, but still entertaining enough to keep on watching!
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The Punisher (2004)
7/10
Why is Marvel doing this...
3 February 2008
... to one of their darkest heroes?! This movie should be sinister and frightening, just like the comics.

Instead, this piece of crap adds one movie connection to one another without any own or new ideas (espacially the "Desperado"-Part was simply a lousy copy). The story is as simple as any old 80ties movie, and some of them (like Arnies classic "Commando") are way better then "Punisher".

It's sad, since the beginning of the movie isn't that cheesy, but when we first meet the freaky neighbours of Frank Castle, and the dinner scene took place... Well, then you know you watch a plain awful movie! Even WWE-Star Kevin Nash appears as Popeyes evil brother! Holy cow!

Still, the action at the beginning and in the end is very well made, Thomas Jane acts as always (solid B-movie quality), Travolta does a good job as the villain, some other real actors needed money and waste their talent in this one (Will Patton from "Remember the Titans", Roy Scheider from "Jaws"), so, if you are into B-Action-movies with first class special effects, never ever read the "Punisher" comics and don't mind a missing storyline, bad jokes & silly sidekicks, you might enjoy this.

I for myself think, the next time Avi Arad and Stan Lee should watch "Sin City" to see that it is possible to turn a dark comic series into a very good film noir.
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1/10
High School Horror Musical
11 May 2007
Can you imagine this: the „Spy kids" (and their parents) try to solve the mystery of a strange curse while working undercover in the world of "High School Musical"? Sounds like a great parody, but sadly, this isn't one. "Hangman's Curse" takes itself serious, and this is a big, big, HUGE mistake!

When the film starts, you didn't notice anything unusual for a typical B-Horror-movie. We learn that a secret group exists, called the "Veritas" project, we see a somber student hang himself (lets say we can imagine it, luckily they don't show the poor guys death) and then the local football-players from his High school seems to be cursed by the mysterious hangman. Nothing new so far, but as a fan of B-Movies I was interested and keep on watching.

Then we meet the agents of the Veritas project. Actually, they hunt drug dealers undercover. Hm. A bit confusing to me: Why should a paranormal organization hunt simple drug dealers (unless they are Vampires or Ghosts…)? I forgot that point as I realized, that these agents are – a family! Mom, Dad, and two Teenager (sister+brother) are the Veritas Project. While I tried to realize this, they get their next assignment: Working undercover in a High School. And now, the director really lost it. Instead of horror action we dive into the world of a typical American High School with every cliché you can think of! We have all the groups there. The Football Players. The Gothics. The Nerds.

I still can't believe that any producer paid money to make such a ridiculous (but completely unfunny!) movie! Why does actors like David Keith ("Firestarter") and Tom Wright ("Marked for Death" , "Martial Law") waste their talent in such a crap? Well, this movie is nonetheless an important film for me. Cause the next time someone ask me "What is the worst horror movie you ever saw?" I can say: "Hangman's Curse!"
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Post Mortem (2006– )
1/10
100% Rip-off from CSI
17 February 2007
If you are a fan of CSI, do yourself a favor, don't watch this poor rip-off. The interior, camera works, story elements, the wanna-be-acting of the main chars... Everything is a simple copy of CSI, without any own ideas or creative moments. Some elements even remind me of good old "Derrick" or "Tatort"-movies.

The main problem is the leading actor. "CSI" has William Petersen as Gil Grissom, a great actor and a great character, and "Post Mortem" has... Hannes Jaenicke. Don't get me wrong, i normally like him, his first movie ("Abwärts", 1984, with Götz George) is one of the best German thriller. Recently, he made some B-Movies, and since i am a die hard fan of these genre, i watched them ("Submerged" was good, "Venomous" OK, "Stranded" a mess). But giving Jaenicke the role of Dr. Daniel Koch was a huge mistake. Would you watch a series with Dolph Lundgren as psychologist? Or with Michael Dudikoff as a profiler? You probably would not, and nor does it work in this TV-show.

So, simply forget about it and watch the original, no matter if you prefer Vegas, Miami or NY - everything from Anthony Zuiker is way better!
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4/10
Good story, bad director
8 March 2006
Warning: Spoilers
I just watch this movie on TV and the beginning of the film is quiet dark and, for a 90-Years movie of German television, very hard. If you can handle the brute final death scene of Susanne Meyer in the toilet, you want to know what happened to the 3 years old Rikki Forster and if the police can catch the rapist and murderer of Susanne Meyer. And that the movie attacks the methods of the boulevard press it's also mentionable!

But the interesting story starts to get to confusing, boring and boring from minute to minute, sometimes even difficult to follow. This seems to be the fault from the director, 'cause the movie slacks at points were the action should go straight forward. To much talking about unimportant things gets me kind of sleepy on 2 AM.

The acting isn't that bad. Some of them are wooden, but the most of the crew does a good job. The older actor's, Hans Clarin and Brigitte Mira, play their roles really good and believable. Robert Atzorn, Father of the missing child, gives the pain (connected with sinking hope and growing anger even against the own wife!) a face. Lehmann (german voice of Bruce Willis and the villain in "Ein Schloß am Wörthersee") as the Lokalchef without scruples acts, as most, great.

So, all in all, this could be a real good TV-Thriller. But the tension sinks instead rise, and that makes it REAL hard to watch the movie till the end.
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Untold (2002)
5/10
Boring, but...
19 February 2006
Warning: Spoilers
MAY CONTAIN SPOILERS

OK, i admit, this movie is kind of boring. People who discuss about monsters and wandering through woods aren't really entertaining. The shaking camera and the lousy effects they use are senseless and annoying. But anyway, i give the movie 5 stars. Why? Because of two reasons:

1. Lance Henriksen acts really good - as always. 2. The end is really surprising and not the obvious The-Yeti-is-evil-and-try-to-kill-everybody plot.

Be patient, watch it till the end and you shouldn't be to disappointed. I for myself enjoyed it the most time.
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5/10
Trash at it's best!
18 February 2006
Warning: Spoilers
WARNING: MAY INCLUDE SPOILERS

Can you imagine a movie including a Russian submarine, the ancient continent Atlantis, a evil Punk-Rock-Gang trying to capture the world and some Vietnam veterans fighting against them? No? Nor do I, till I saw "Atlantis Inferno" yesterday - This is trash at it's best! The story is so funny, you can't believe anyone took this crap serious – not even the director of "Atlantis Inferno". Some American Scientists try to get a sunk Russian submarine from the ground, without the UdSSR recognizing it. I can't believe this was possible in the years of the cold war. Also, I don't understand why they use a oil platform to lift the submarine – But, whatever. Unfortunately, the atomic rockets inside the submarine somehow (??) wakes the continent Atlantis, which rises from the ground. Why? Well, who cares? At the same moment, Punk-Rockers from Atlantis (please, imagine it! Punk-Rockers from Atlantis! Who ever thought that a Punk-Rock-Gang lived in Atlantis and their Leader is a weirdo with a Glass skull as Face??) arrive in the USA and start killing every human they find. A massive storm destroy the platform, and some of the soldiers, the scientists and a pilot get saved by two retired Vietnam-Fighters, now working as soldiers-of-fortune. These bunch of survivors now fight against Mr. Glass skull and his none-human (but look like humans) army of rockers. I don't wanna spoil everything, so watch the movie and enjoy the Indiana-Jones-meets-Alien End by yourself.

The Action is bloody, real bloody, sometimes even disgusting. The Special effects don't deserve the word "special", they were made with models from a toy-steam-train, maybe in the bathroom of the director (e.g. the storm scene). The Acting is standard for a B-Movie.

If you really love trash movies with a REALLY strange story, this is a must-seen! All others should avoid "Atlantis Inferno" at all costs.
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Groom Lake (2002)
4/10
Not Bill's best
15 February 2006
First of all, i must admit, I am a great Shater-Fan. I read his books ("The Ashes of Eden" was a great one) and listen to his CD "Has Been". But "Groom Lake", or "The Vistior" like it is called on the DVD i bought, is low average. On the DVD-Cover are Pictures of The Enterprise D - and this Movie has nothing to do with Star Trek! And the Photos on the Backside are from a other movie with Bill - "American Psycho 2"! This is kind of weird, and, well, a bit a shame for a great actor like Bill Shatner. He don't need such crappy tricks to sell DVDs!

The film itself is a B-movie, and if you like Sci-Fi-Movie, you maybe like this one. Yes, the story is a bit confusing and not really straight told. Yes, some of the effects show the low budget of "Groom Lake". But it has it's moments, and if you like Sci-Fi, you maybe like it. The only thing i really don't like are the shaky hand-camera-scenes.
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