Alfred Hitchcock Presents (TV Series)

Coming, Mama (1961)

Alfred Hitchcock: Self - Host

Quotes 

• [afterword] 

  Self - Host : That may not have been situation comedy for Lucy, who was caught on her next try, but perhaps the rest of you found it amusing. I shall be back after the following, which is designed to sober you up.

  [commercial] 

  Self - Host : Next week, our situation comedy takes place in far-off Denmark. Junior overhears a scrap of conversation and quite naturally jumps to the conclusion that his uncle murdered his father in order to marry his mother. This amusing misunderstanding leads to a great number of hilarious situations and to the death of all four principals. I'm sure you'll enjoy it, so tune in next week when we present "Junior Sees a Ghost". Good night.

• [introduction - Hitchcock has a box and a glass of water on a stool] 

  Self - Host : Good evening. Tonight we have another treat for those of you who enjoy a peek behind the scenes. I'm sure most of you imagine that years of thought and work go behind the creation of a television situation comedy series. You are absolutely correct. However, modern science has managed to distill and concentrate all this work into this small package.

  [picks up box] 

  Self - Host : Instant Situation Comedy. All you do is to add water. You don't even have to stir. Contains the ingredients for a complete cast together with recorded laughter and a large supply of the following --

  [reads] 

  Self - Host : "Retorts, witty. Replies, devastating. Quips, modest. Reproofs, parental. Mots, bons. And takes, double. All that is necessary is to slice the results into 39 segments."

  [pours contents of the box onto the floor and adds the water causing an explosion that creates the cast of a situation comedy] 

  Self - Host : That is what I would term 'a population explosion'.