Brad Grunberg: Bernie
Quotes
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Larry Valentine : [Breaking into Bernie's room to rescue him] Holy Shamo!
Bernie : I'm sorry I can't get out of bed.
Chuck Levine : There's a bed under there?
Larry Valentine : Can you walk at all?
Bernie : I haven't walked in five years!
Chuck Levine : Alright, maybe we strap a rocketship on this guy we'll get him outta here.
Larry Valentine : No, no, we can do this, People lift cars, it's adrenaline, you know.
Chuck Levine : Cars? This guy is more like a freaking minivan.
Larry Valentine : Hey, buddy we're gonna help you outta here, come on.
Bernie : How's my mom?
Chuck Levine : [referring to Bernie's obesity] If she survived the birthing process, nothing's gonna take her down.
Chuck Levine : Let me chop him off, we'll take him down in pieces.
Bernie : What?
Chuck Levine : I'm kidding.
Larry Valentine : Just grab the back of our coats.
Chuck Levine : Hey, did you start this fire by lighting one of your farts?
Bernie : [chuckles] That's funny.
Bernie : I'm running momma, I'm running like the wind.
[They roll down the stairs and Bernie lands his butt on top of Chuck's face]
Larry Valentine : Chuck, you alright?
[Chuck gives Larry a thumbs up but Bernie farts and he pulls his thumb down]
Larry Valentine : [laughs] Oh my god, oh sweet Lord, broccoli!
