dfgriff's Reviews

Batman Begins (2005)

9/10

23 June 2005

"Batman Begins" has a few forgivable flaws and a climax that doesn't necessarily make sense but overall this will make you a Batman fan all over again (especially if you never were one). I really wasn't in the mood to see this movie not after enduring "Batman and Robin," but I thought I would go see it anyway on the big screen.

What makes this film work are the supporting characters. Never before have Alfred and Jim Gordon ever been used as more than decoration (at least not in the live actions). Michael Caine is the best Alfred ever and Gary Oldman is the best Jim Gordon ever. And they actually do something in this movie too. Liam Neeson is great as ... well ... I won't give away what exact he does. Let's just say he's the type of anti-hero I root for in hopes he will beat up the good guy (like Bull's Eye in "Daredevil"). Oddly enough, I was rooting for Batman the whole time.

Christian Bale is, well, the best Batman ever. Best Bruce Wayne ever. The two best scenes are when he first meets Katie Holmes (an under-rated talent who really needs to ditch Tom Cruise before he converts her to his flaky Bowfinger religion and so she can play in the sequel) after his self-imposed exile and when he terrifies information out of a crooked cop. But Bale has always been great. I've been a fan of him since his title role in "American Psycho."

"Batman Begins" is actually a "Spider-man" movie in disguise. All the elements used to make "Spider-man" spiffy are used here as well. In previous Bat-movies, Bruce Wayne is a prop. The audience could wait for him to put on his cowl. But in this installment, the audience can't get enough of Bruce Wayne.

I'm already eager for the sequel, especially if it's who is hinted to in the end. I figured "Mr. and Mrs. Smith" would be the best summer film this year had to offer but "Batman Begins" thankfully proves me wrong.

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Dinosaur Babes (1996 Video)

10/10

Who would've thought?

18 June 2005

If I taught at a film school I would use this film as an example of how to do a low budget film right. Dinosaur Babes could have been easily been played for camp (and no one would've blamed the filmmakers) but it was effectively pulled off well considering the premise.

The special effects are low budget but used very well. Actually, the title of the movie is misleading. Granted there are plenty of half- and fully naked cave girls but the movie is so much more. Heck, after seeing this I want to make my own dinosaur movie.

The only suggestion I have to make the film better is to expand the role of the narrator. The other characters could talk in grunts or some primitive tongue and the narrator could translate for us as if we were watching one of those Mutual of Omaha wildlife programs. Sometimes the continuity isn't perfect but this is still an amazing film to watch.

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15 Minutes (2001)

1/10

Very misleading title

22 March 2005

I was much upset to learn that 15 Minutes actually isn't 15 minutes but 120. Geez, I have ADD and I can't handle anything for that long. Not when there is a lot of talking. So much could've been edited out to make this movie shorter and better. Why do De Niro and Burns have to chatter all the time they aren't saying anything important. Just cut it all out and just show them shooting at and blowing things up. Now that is something I can watch for a long time. And what's with the Eastern European bad guys talking all the time about being famous and criticizing the media. They don't need to say anything. We already know they are bad because they are foreigners who talk with an accent.

Violence I can handle and am always wishing for more. But nudity is another big thing on my list. The movie really suffers because there isn't a girl in the movie I was just dying to see naked, with the exception of Charlize Theron. I wasn't screaming, "Show us your +i+s!" bu instead, "Keep your clothes on! Please!" Come on, was De Niro so expensive for this movie that a babe with decent knockers couldn't be hired? As much as I admire De Niro I just have no desire to see him naked. Theron is usually good about getting naked in her films (God, I loved her The Devil's Advocate) but she was completely underused.

I'm tired of movies that mislead you to see the movie. This movie wasn't 15 minutes at all. And any movie that lies to you like that can be good at all, unless it has car crashes and boobies.

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In My Skin (2002)

A Movie that gets under your skin

25 February 2004

The Belcourt Cinema in Nashville warned ticket holders that they would not get a refund if they left the theater as In My Skin, a creepy French quasi-horror film about a girl who cuts into her body, played -- no matter how much they protested. Three people left the theater and one girl looked to be crying. I got light-headed, my forehead felt hot, my stomach wanted to void its contents, and my brain wanted me to flee -- and that was when she went to see the doctor about the cut on her leg. (I had to close my eyes and calm my thoughts for about a minute.) The wound was nasty but it was nothing compared to what she did to herself later. Most of the cutting happened off-camera which on made her actions more gruesome because the imagination had been activated. Just the sound alone was enough to make me cringe. When I slept later that night a nightmare haunted me. My leg was craved of all it flesh and muscle until nothing was left but bone. Yes, this movie truly disturbed me worse than anything I've ever seen. Worse than Texas Chain Saw Massacre or Hellraiser -- mainly because In My Skin was done as a real film. No, serial killers or demons from Hell, just a girl with mental problems.

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Gerry (2002)

Don't Watch While Depressed

7 December 2003

I watched Gerry when I was not in the best of mental states. Winter time and the holidays really makes me depressed plus things haven't been going well with my babe and I. So I was not in the best of moods. With the long camera takes and nil-dialogue, I was stranded in the desert with the other two characters. My depression worsen until I felt abandoned and wanted to die as well. Luckily I survived Gerry but if I ever see it again, I'll see it in a happier mood.

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Pirates of the Caribbean: The Curse of the Black Pearl (2003)

Depp upstage CGIs

8 September 2003

The main stars of movies today are the special effects. Golem is the most talked about topic from The Two Towers and as well as Jar Jar from the new Star Wars films. No one talks about Nick Nolte's fine acting in the Hulk (only how unrealistic the creature looked). But Depp was able to upstage the CGI-undead-pirates with great ease. What Depp has done is short of a miracle. If Depp doesn't win an oscar for his ability to wow audiences away from the dazzling synthespians then no one deserves the award.

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Terminator 3: Rise of the Machines (2003)

Vote 4 Arnold

14 July 2003

Terminator 3 is a fun summer film but it needed to be if Arnold Schwarzenegger would be using the film as a platform for his bid for governor in California. It is a clever film to make Arnold into an American hero. Arnold plays a cyborg, a reformed enemy, who is now on the side of humans, who are fighting in a war against the machines who have destroyed the American Way of life. He has been sent back into the past (our present) to prevent John Connor from being assassinated by a sexy Terminatrix (who always looks beautiful and nicely dressed no matter how much damage she endures -- vice versa for Arnold the cyborg, who literally looks like a wreck at the end of the film). The movie is about John Conner and the Terminator, who has been Connor's father figure. Both endure a personal crisis and learn to grow. John Conner becomes the hero he is destined to become but he needed help. The Terminator believes in his destiny and does whatever he can to save from him harm until John Connor reaches his potential. The Terminator, who deems himself as obsolete, becomes corrupted and tries to kill John Connor but he fights against his own program, reboots, and becomes a brand, spanking new cyborg. He sacrifices himself to take out the Teminatrix. The Terminator's main function was not to save John Connor but to inspire him. John Connor becomes the new American hero because of the Terminator. This is the image Arnold wants voters to think when Gray Davis is recalled. Arnold knows he is too old to be the action hero anymore but he has seen action (mostly on film), he is on our side, and he will inspire the young men so that when Judgment Day comes they will be waving Old Glory.

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28 Days Later (2002)

Better than the Sandra Bullock original HA!

4 July 2003

One of the few times that the sequel is better than the original. Sandra Bullock is replaced with a British unknown, Cillian Murphy, and instead of alcoholism, the protagonist must deal with zombies created by dark biology without the benefit of a 12-step program. Director Danny Boyle, the same who did Trainspotting, possessed the wheat germ of a wonderful storyline but could never brew it into anything potent. Much like alcoholics, the protagonist and his friends depend upon others to get them out of their problem rather than relying on themselves. The deus ex machina ending is not a happy ending, it is only the beginning of more problems. They trusted the military once, much to their misfortune, why should they trust them again? Instead of being governmentholics, they need to be developing their own government.

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Kangaroo Jack (2003)

Citizen Kane of Kangaroo films

4 July 2003

I dare anyone to name a better Kangaroo movie than Kangaroo Jack (of course, to be fair, I couldn't name a worse movie either). Kangaroo Jack has the most forced plot I have ever seen in a movie. A major rewrite would be needed to make this film better. Here's my idea: Start off the movie with Christpher Walken and Marton Csokas in Australia, arranging a hit. Before Walken can pay Csokas, a kangaroo hops by and the money is dropped accidently into her pouch. Walken and Csokas chase after the kangaroo into the Outback in turn madcap fashion. Enter: Jerry O'Connell and Anthony Anderson, two college drop-outs who are trying to hike through Australia but are instead stranded. They befriend the kangaroo and find the money -- and become targets of W & C. As the plot advances, Jerry and Anthony learn the money in the pouch is suppose to pay Csokas who has been hired to take out Estella Warren, a ranger who is trying to expose Walken as an animal smuggler. Csokas and Walken are stopped in the most humiliating fashion. Jerry and Anthony find their true calling as rangers at an Australia park and Jerry finds true love with Estella. The kangaroo hops off into the sunset. This rewrite still wouldn't make this the Citizen Kane of Kangaroo films but it would be an enjoyable piece of family entertainment for both children and adults.

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Irreversible (2002)

An ugly but yet beautiful film

19 June 2003

Warning: Spoilers

When Irreversible premiered at Cannes, viewers stormed out and declared the film unwatchable. At that point I knew this was a film made for an audience of me. When it came to the Belcourt, thanks to the Nashville Cinema Underground, I was there opening day. This review is filled with so-called spoilers but this information will actually a person understand the movie better and to not be frightened by this celluloid vortex. Irreversible, a cross between A Clockwork Orange and 2001: A Space Odyssey with touches of Memento and Rope, is not easy to watch. The movie literally starts backwards with end credits rolling upward and "begins" just after the climax. Like most acts of violence people see, hear or read about, they learn about it afterward, when someone has been arrested or hospitalized. People don't have the benefit of seeing the actual events unfold before them, if so they could probably step in and prevent the ugly climax from happening (especially since they have hindsight). The climax is ugly and it happens next. Two men storm into a gay fuc < bar, searching for one guy. The bar is under lit and the camera is anything but steady. The shaky camera work of Blair Witch Project doesn't induce the cinematic vertigo of Irreversible. When people are recognizable, they are upsidedown or sideways. When one of the men finds the guy, they fight and the man (played by Vincent Cassel, whom you may remember from Brotherhood of the Wolf if the camera ever stays steady enough) loses the bout. The guy graphically breaks his arm and is about to anal rape him when the second man (played by Albert Dupontel) rushes toward the guy and bashes his head repeated with fire extinguisher until it is literally pulverized. Only later does the audience learn the savage murder was an act of revenge. The guy brutally sodomized man #1's girlfriend (played by Monica Bellucci, who recently appeared in Matrix: Reloaded) after she left a party. Irreversible is definitely an ugly film but as the plot flows backwards it becomes beautiful and tranquil. Oddly enough this movie is in praise of women. While men rape and murder, women bring life and beauty. Men objective women: When the girlfriend is "first" mentioned we know her only by name and when the audience first see her she is a victim and sex object; her face is hardly shown. Only later as the audience see her face and hear her speak do we not see her as a future victim but as a person. The movie "ends" in timelessness. She is reading a book on a blanket, surrounded by giddy children. The "ending" is timeless because the director (Gasper Noe), plays with the viewer's perception once more. They are adjusted to his unorthordox cinematography and are responding to his cues like Pavlov's Dogs but the events before the camera don't follow accordingly to his logic anymore. The events are not going backwards as they had beforehand. Is the "final moment" an event in the pre-rape past or is the audience seeing her as a survivor of man's brutality, someone capable of continuing to live her life?

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Adaptation. (2002)

The last act of Adaptation

17 February 2003

Why is everyone hissy fitting over the last act of Adaptation? Hints were given throughout the movie that it was going to be completely different. Adaptation, an evolution of 8 1/2, becomes funniest during this last part and demonstrates the evolution (or devolution) of story telling. First, there is reality. Then an article is written about an incident in reality. The article becomes a book. The book is adapted into a movie. Each adaptation requires a change, especially to film. What is gripping in a book is boring in the pictures. Elements that may not be obvious in the book are flushed out and expounded upon. The story evolves, stays fresh.

This is how the oral stories or yester-centuries survived for so long. Bards changed and updated them as the circumstances required. For Adaptation, an element of crime was added for movie-goer today who just see films as a way to waste time, to justify why they spent $6 bucks to see a 2-hour long movie. Adaptation is flawless. This is the movie that explains what story telling is all about.

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xXx (2002)

XXX is not ZZZ

4 January 2003

When XXX fired a heat seeking missile at the sniper who smoked all the time, I almost lost a lot of respect for the film. Not the best plot in the world but the film is a guilty pleasure. I like the film despite all its imperfections. Mainly because of Asia Argento and Marton Csokas the movie is great. Vin Diesel has a stage presence but Asia's course sexuality and Marton's creepiness upstage Diesel. If the Hollywood hunk wants to rise above becoming the next Keanu Reeves, he best watch and learn from Asia and Marton, as well as from Samuel L. Jackson, who even when playing a two-dimensional character such as Gibbons he still can add depth. Much of the movie is two-dimensional. All the characters realize their solipsism but they cherish their roles anyway -- life may be just a movie but at least the players are going to have fun. Why else would everyone gather at the bridge in Prague, instead of flee, to watch XXX on Ahab even though they know poison gas will be released. Prague is another reason for liking XXX, the movie. Being a big fan of Kafka, I have wanted to visit this city. I was shown Prague with car chases, raves, and anarchists thrown in the mix (if Kafka had been shown this side, he might not have been depressed). Oh, yes, I'm a big fan of XXX. I don't know if I would go see the sequel -- depends on whether Asia is in it.

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Scarlet Diva (2000)

Scarlet Dive -- today's Blue Angel

4 January 2003

Not since Marlene Dietrich (of Blue Angel) has a woman come on the silver screen with such raw sexuality. As Lola Lola, Dietrich used men to for her own advancement and amusement; today, as woman have have made tremendous social advances, they are using themselves for their own amusement, such as Anna Battista in Scarlet Diva. If Asia Argento is course in XXX, she is an anarchist in Scarlet Diva, less of an autobiography, more of an example of 21st century voyeurism. Asia has taken all the tricks learned from her father, Dario, and using them to create a slice of life look at an actress trying to figure out what she wants -- blah, blah, blah. No one wants that type of insight about Scarlet Diva. Possible viewers just want to know if it is as sexual as the the poster teases. Oh, yes. The movie is sexual and brutal. This ain't American Pie, where sex is a nice package one can buy at Wal-mart. Sex in Scarlet Diva is shown for its many facets -- as a way to kill time, to punish, to rape, or to connect. Viewers of Scarlet Diva will be f***ed. Some will claim to have been raped but others will thank Asia for the ride.

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Metropolis (1927)

Which one indeed

7 December 2002

Everytime I see Metropolis, I'm seeing it for the first time. I saw one version back in college, another with a soundtrack by Queen and Adam Ant, and now a new one has been released, supposed to be what you would have seen at the 1927 premiere (except for the missing scenes). Each time the plot is slightly different. Scenes that didn't make one version appear in another or are switched around. The appeal of Metropolis is the lack of an extant, one that everyone agrees is the correct version. Metropolis (which inspired Bladerunner, Star Wars saga, and even an anime by the same name) is ever-changing, fluid. The film with the dazzling visuals can be re-edited to make a whole different movie. Someone with access to CGIs could completely revamp the movie.

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*Corpus Callosum (2002)

Umm...I really don't know!

3 December 2002

Michael Snow is an experimental filmmaker who uses Corpus as an excuse to see what he can do with computer effects (I think he must've read Scott McCloud's Understanding Comics and felt compelled to translates McCloud's suggestions over to the cinema). Corpus has no plot only themes which take place either in a workplace or at a home. Things blow up, bodies as warped (as well as the film itself), hermaphrodites pose naked, and the credits roll midway. Movies such as these are fun to watch, inspiring. Just proves that there are plenty of ways to make a movie.

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Solaris (2002)

Solaris is a continuation of Solaris

1 December 2002

Slow yes, but you should watch the 1972 Soviet original which last 165 minutes. Soderbergh peps the story a bit as compared to Tarkovsky's classic version. Which is better? The obvious answer would be the book but I never read it. Actually you will need to see the first movie in order to thoroughly enjoy the the latest edition. Soderbergh just continued on the themes explored first by Tarkosky. Nothing is rehashed. New questions are asked. In fact, the whole point of the movie is to have Chris and Rheya talk to one another. Rheya grows beyond the restrictions Chris' memories place on her and he remembers the real reason he loved her.

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Sorority Boys (2002)

A brilliant study of gender roles

22 November 2002

Where else will you find a main stream movie that explores gender roles? a movie where men are forced to act and behave like women? where they worry about their figure, their clothes, and their daily hassles?

The plot is not about men dressing in drag so they see women naked. Oh, no. The plot is to see how men (the Sensitive Guy, the Sex God Jerk, and the Clueless Neanderthal) would behave if they were thrown into the same situations on a college campus. All women's issues are addressed -- from bathroom usage to date rape. The date rape in Sorority Boys, a comedy, has ignited a few angry reactions, barking that rape is not a laughing matter. Neither is nuclear war but no one seems to mind the jokes in Dr. Strangelove. The rape victim himself is the Sex God Jerk who ends up being humiliated the same way as he humiliated his sexual conquest. He deals with the same emotional trauma as a real rape victim (even denial). The Sensitive Guy thinks dressing in drag will give him leverage over a Feminist he adores. Oddly enough, the Feminist rejects him as a male but loves him as the female. She thinks she has found her true love unaware of the Sensitive Guy's false front. How is that for absurdity at its greatest? The Clueless Neanderthal is a curious one. He seems to have no purpose in the movie but he is important in advancing the plot. He is the man everyone wishes would go away but yet there he is. The Clueless Neanderthal remains and, in his crude way, becomes closer to females. The overall public reaction to Sorority Boys has been mild. Viewers want to see T & A, not to have sexual stereotypes dispelled. They want mindless comedy, not a surreal dialogue about gender roles. We want to see our women as sexual objects which is why we can only see Sorority Boys as a crude sex comedy. The director used to work for The Simpsons so there is a lot of humor that isn't caught on a first viewing. Sorority Boys lacks the cutting humor of The Simpsons but this movie does possess a deep motive than just exploiting bathroom humor. Granted their are a lot of lousy movies with good message (e.g. The New Guy and Deuce Bigalow: Male Gigolo) but Sorority Boys has a strong story that wasn't haphazardly constructed. Besides where else are you going to see a mock Star Wars light saber duel done with dildos?

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xXx (2002)

Triple X kicks Double Oh 7's @$$

11 August 2002

Now this is how spying such be done: extreme sports, European raves, girls swinging on bedpost, and anarchy. The best spy thriller since Roger Moore was 007. Vin Diesel may not have much acting range but he's stage presence is as huge as his chest.

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