"Scream Queens" Haunted House (TV Episode 2015) Poster

(TV Series)


Emma Roberts: Chanel Oberlin



  • Chanel Oberlin : Um, this just in - Ms. Bean's not dead. She haunting the campus with her fatness and murdering people.

  • Chanel Oberlin : Halloween is the most important day of the year. It's the one on the Gregorian calendar where you're allowed to go around terrifying children and not be branded a psychopath.

  • Chanel Oberlin : Guys can be as porky as they want and we still like them. I'm as skinny as Karen Carpenter in the morgue and Chad Radwell still won't commit to me!

  • Chanel Oberlin : Chanel-O-Ween is approaching, so I went shopping with my comatose grandmother's credit card and bought presents.

  • Chanel Oberlin : A sitting Kappa President has not lost the office to a freshman in one hundred and fifty years! I am responsible for the worst pledge class in Kappa history! And now Zayday's gonna win because we live in the age of Obama?

  • Chanel Oberlin : I recently took a women's studies class. Yes, because it was a requirement, but I learned a lot anyways. Like the culture that says it's okay for a man to objectify a woman for her appearance is the same culture that pressures girls as young as ten to have eating disorders.

    Tommy : So you're basically sayin' I'm the one responsible for making you look hot? You're welcome.

  • Chanel Oberlin : I am a future network news anchor who's super-classy and has almost no fat on her body. But a lot of my fans are, like, friendless, dumpy coeds at this or that nursing school in one of this country's various national armpits. And Chanel-O-Ween is the one time of year where I can give these precious donkeys something to look forward to. They put down their Hot Pockets and bask in the warm glow of what it feels like... to love me.

  • Zayday Williams : It might behoove you to recall that everyone here witnessed you actually murder someone, a fact that's one anonymous phone call from being a juicy little segment on the local news.

    Chanel Oberlin : I didn't kill Miss Bean. And if I do murder someone... it's gonna be you.

  • Chanel #3 : Chanel, it's 3 a.m. We're concerned about your mental health. What are you doing?

    Chanel Oberlin : Just sharpening knives. Kitchen knives should be... razor sharp.

  • Chanel Oberlin : I have it on good authority that the Red Devil is gonna kill someone in Zayday's haunted house. Don't let it be you.

    Chanel #5 : How do you know that's gonna happen?

    Chanel Oberlin : I don't. But how stupid would the killer be to NOT kill someone there? It's Halloween, everyone will be in costume. Hell, he could kill someone and people would think it was a decoration

    Chanel #3 : You have this way too thought out.

  • Chanel Oberlin : There is a killer on this campus murdering women. When you treat us like meat, you're no better than him.

  • Chanel Oberlin : You have all rallied around me! Just like I would do for any of you if I wasn't busy that day.

See also

Release Dates | Official Sites | Company Credits | Filming & Production | Technical Specs

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